Hellbound MC - When Broken Hearts Collide

41. Alexis

Waking up the next morning, every part of me hurt. From the pounding in my head to the ache in my groin.

Remembering the nights activities put a grin on my face, and I rolled over to face the man responsible, only to find his side of the bed cold.

Getting up and taking a shower, I headed downstairs, just as all the guys filed out of the room they hold church.

Everyone was murmuring and talking amongst themselves as they headed for the dining room, and their was a strange vibe in the air.

Spotting Tank but not Dom, I made a beeline for him.

Morning bestie, he said with a grin as I approached.

Hey bestie I responded, laughing and rolling my eyes.

What's going on? Where's Reaper?

Just got word in church that our mystery guests next weekend are none other than The Devil's Rejects themselves. Reaper ain't happy, he's in with Pres talking details still. Shouldn't be long, but fuck knows what sorta mood he'll be in. C'mon, let's eat, I'm starving.

I'm sure you are, I laughed earning a disapproving look from him.

So... who are these Devils Rejects anyway? I asked before shoving a fork full of bacon into my mouth.

Geez Alexis you really have been living under a rock haven't you?

They're the biggest motorcycle club in the country. Bunch of cracked out, moralless physcopaths willing to do anything for the payoff. I mean, I've been involved in some pretty dodgy shit with Hellbound over the years. Drugs, guns, murder. But those fuckers?

They kidnap and traffic children and woman and sell them around the world without batting an eye. That's some fucked up shit right there... he trailed off, lost in his own thoughts.

How did you get here? Like, become Hellbound I guess I mean? I asked, bringing his back to the room.

My dad was a loser Lex, beat my mum and I on the daily. Spent all our money on booze and hookers. Think the opposite of what you'd want a father to be. Anyway, one day he packed all his shit and left us, reckoned we were holding him back and he was off to find his true purpose in life. Musta been on some hard drugs by that point.

My mum did the best she could, working two jobs and all that bullshit, but her body started to fail her and soon she could barely leave the house. I was only 14 at the time, nobody would give me a job so I turned to the only thing I could think of. Roaming the city late at night, pickpocketing and stealing food where I could.

One day I had the bad sense to try hustle Grunter, but the fucker was more street smart than me and caught me in the act. Instead of the beating I expected, he took me in, trained me in the club gym, and gave me a job in the garage which paid more than enough to take care of mum. The rest is history.

I sat back in my seat, absorbing every detail of what he'd just told me. It was the most serious I'd ever seen him, and it hurt that he'd had to grow up that way. I don't know what's worse, dead parents, or alive parents who consistently fail you and treat you worse than the shit under their shoe.

Now, if ya repeat any of that I'll have to kill ya, he continued with a grin, returning to the goofy, lovable character that was growing on me.

Like fuck I heard behind me and turned to find Dom, behind us, plate in hand. I'd been so wrapped up listening to Tanks story I hadn't even seen him enter the room.

You touch a hair on my girls head, and I'll fucking skin you alive... brother, Dom said to Tank, a smirk on his face.

Now, now boys, I said playfully.

Nothing to worry bout Reaper, just giving ya girl a run down here on my past.

Dom raised an eyebrow questioningly at Tank. You told her?

Yep. Told ya man, we're besties now, he said standing from the table.

Anyway, promised I'd visit Peggy today, better head off. I'll catch you guys later.

Once he was gone, my attention turned to Dom.

So, these Devils Rejects? How long are they here for? Tank was just telling me about their... uh... unsavory pastimes.

Honestly, I don't know and Grunter won't tell me shit. He's hiding something, I can feel it. Just spent the last 20 minutes tryna get the old man to fess up, like talking to a brick wall though. Whatever it is, its stressing him out. Can see it all over his face.

Frustration etched across his face.

When do you want to go home? He asked me suddenly and I was take aback.

Uhh... I hadn't really thought about it, I lied.

In reality it was all I thought about. Id been here roughly a month, and I was just waiting for the moment when he got sick of me, or the club wanted me out. That's just how my life went, everytime I got a glimpse of something good, got to feel even a slither of happiness, it was usually ripped from me.

Ok, well, I've just been thinking and... umm... with the Devils arriving and all...

Fuck this... I thought. If he wants me gone, I'm out. No way in hell am I going back to the apartment, I still hadn't even spoken to Charlie still, was avoiding it like the plague. But I'd figure it out.

Standing from the table, I turned to storm out.

Just fucking say it Dominic. You want me out. Its fine. I'll be gone by the end of the day.

And with that I turned and ran from the room before the tears that were threatening to flow spilled over. I wouldn't allow him or any of his brothers to see me cry. Fuck that.

Slamming the bedroom door behind me, I threw myself down on the bed, allowing the grief to take control.

I knew I was a fucking idiot. I told myself I'd never fall for another man again, never put my heart on the line.

But the ache in my heart told me it was too late, I loved that fucking man. And once again its all one sided. He got what he wanted from me, and now he had no need for me. Probably freaked him out that I was getting close to the people he called family.

I could feel my body falling more and more into despair, a familiar feeling that had been kept at bay for so long, but was now unleashing havoc on my mind, reminding me of the unwanted piece of shit I truly was.

Gasping for air as the waves of panic hit, nobody here to save me, I turned to my own form of relief. Locking myself in the bathroom, I found my makeup case, and flipped it over to reveal the extra pocket underneath.

Opening it, I was relieved to see my old friend in there. My blade. My release. My savior from the pain. When life got to much it was the only thing there for me. I deserved this. Not only was I fucked up emotionally and physically scarred, add homeless to the mix and what a fucking mess I'd become.

How stupid could I be to think that a man like Dom could ever want a pathetic shell of a person like me. Why did I believe he would?

Pulling the blade from its sheath, I studied the tiny piece of metal in my hand. Taking a deep breath, I plunged it into my thigh, crying out as a new type of pain shot through my leg. I liked this pain. Could control it. Didn't need anybody for it.

Dragging it through my skin, the burn felt good. I'd take physical pain over emotional any day.

As my brain became light, I glanced at my leg. Oh shit. I'd gone a lot deeper than ever before, and it was bleeding profusely. Ahh well, its just what I deserved.

Banging on the door interrupted my peace, but my body was tired and weak.

The door crashed open just as blackness overtook me.