Let You Love Me || tae•gi•kook ||

I Understand Now

[Yoongi's POV]
"...Yoongi." I jump slightly, my attention fully on Namjoon who sat across from me.

As usual, he had his notepad and pen in hand, and sat with one long leg across the other. His head cocked to the side in a questioning manner, and his eyes watch my every move.

"Sorry. Did you...ask something?"I scratched the back of my hand nervously.

Fuck...I can't even focus on our session because my mind keeps taking me back to the day Jungkook rejected me.

"Yes. I asked you how you are managing, but from the looks of it, it seems that there is something bothering you." I play with my fingers and slightly nod. I can't lie to this human. I can never seem to hide anything from him.

"Yeah um, well it's...complicated."

"Nothing is complicated unless you explain it step by step. It's alight Yoongi, you can tell me. Are you scared Tae and Kook will find out? You know I won't tell Taehyung or Jungkook anything." I know that.

"No it's not that. It's just..." I hug myself to try and stop the heat that creeps up my cheeks.

"A little—embarrassing...?" I avoid looking him in the eyes. Shit. I hope my face isn't red.

"How so? Can you elaborate?" Namjoon pressures me, and I squeezed my hands in the middle of my thighs.

"I guess I'm just confused. They don't want me...like I do." I try to explain the situation, but it's hard to even say what I want to say without sounding stupid.

"What do you mean by want?" I bite my lip and cover my face in irritation. How the hell am I supposed to tell this human I want to have sex with them but they don't want me!? So embarrassing. I could die right here and now.

"Does this want perhaps mean something like intimacy?" My heart skips a beat and I peek through my fingers to see him tapping his pen on his knee. How did he know that? Was I really that easy to read? I slowly remove my hands from my face and look down at my feet.

"Yeah...it felt like he didn't want me like I did. It's been like that for some time now." It's only been a couple of days since Jungkook and I had our little fight. Well I can't really call it a fight—more like a little discussion. And it wasn't like it was the first time this has happened. I've been pushed away more than once, and by both of them.

But lately it's been on my mind the more I recall it. Was he just not in the mood? Or was it a bad timing? Or maybe I am just horny all the time?

Wait... "Am I...a pervert?"
Namjoon's laugh suddenly fills the quiet room that we were in.

"No Yoongi, you're not a pervert." I don't know if I should be relieved or upset at his laughter.

"If you ask me, I'd say it's actually pretty normal to want to engage in intimate activities with our partners." I sigh in relief.

"So I'm not a pervert?" I ask again to reassure myself.

"Of course not. You see there are two things that make our relationships well—relationships. Those two things are love and sex. People need to have both in order to feel...complete, if that makes sense." I frown at his words.

"Then...why don't they want to have sex with me? Do I not make them feel complete?" And then it hit me.

Ohhh, right. I see.

Jungkook has Taehyung. That's why he didn't want me. Why have sex with me when he already has Tae who satisfies him.

That makes sense. I wouldn't satisfy him like Taehyung would.