Dust || Yoon Jeonghan

Eye of the storm

Present:

i hummed absent mindedly as i hiked up. since it was snowing too much, most of the people chose to just drive up while some cameramen and directors stayed for the shoot. we couldn't have changed the plan in the last moment.

there wasn't much reason for me to hike up except the cold felt in harmony with how i was feeling. and without having much to do, i could just trail behind the others. 

i kicked the soft snow as i walked, the way it's clumps fell apart was funny. only a little force could destroy what seemed to be a whole.

it's so much easier to destroy than build.

and so much quicker.

it started to take more strength to drag my feet up as the snow cover thickened. but i poured all my energy into keeping up the pace. that was all i could do. just keep moving, leaving a trail of crumbled snow behind me.

i didn't realize that the others had stopped walking until their footsteps disappeared from the ground my eyes were fixed at. i looked up, feeling like a lost kid. everyone seemed worried for some reason.

i should've asked what's wrong.

there may've been a way to make things right.

but i didn't.

i stood there as they discussed something, the words sounding like nonsensical gibberish as i played with a tree branch. trying to dust the snow off so it doesn't break off under the weight.

there's a limit to the pressure one can handle.

"HOW DO WE FIND THE WAY THEN?"

someone said loudly. the tone was polite but the sound was enough to catch even my attention. it seemed that was intentional because it looked like i was the only one who had no idea what was going on prompting seungkwan to speak loudly to break my trance.

i didn't move from my place but listening to the conversations going on, i realized that a storm was brewing and we were lost. 

i didn't feel any panic though. perhaps i am used to feeling lost.

"then the 14 of you can stay here while we look for the way and bring help. is this alright with you ms. song."

i nodded without tearing my gaze from the flower i had discovered beneath the snow that used to cover the branch. it was a spotless white flower. it looked so out of place in the nothingness surrounding it. there was something pure and pristine about it and even though i don't linger on such things, i couldn't help but admire it's resilience.

"you did well."

i brushed my finger tips over it's soft petals gently but as my hand moved downwards, it made sharp contact with something. i pulled my hand away and a thorn plucked out of it, sinking deep into my finger.

i hissed as the pain shot through my skin. it was too deep. perhaps i was too slow in retrieving my hand. i bit my lip as i removed the thorn leading to blood tricking down my finger.

it hurts. 

i closed my eyes, forehead creased as i tried feeling the pain as much as i could. 

"are you okay?"

seungkwan asked and i nodded.  

"arin?" he pressed and i furrowed my brows as i was forced to open my eyes. 

"yeah?" 

i realized that there were eyes on me. way too many for my comfort. seungkwan tilted his torso to try and see what was going on with me but i curled my fingers into a fist.