Who Wants To Live Forever...

Face It Alone

A/N -  I am not a medical expert but have read a lot about AIDS and the treatments.  In particular I have read about the specific treatments Freddie had.  I find it both fascinating and heartbreaking.

Note - The physicians mentioned in this chapter are real.  The actual specialists who treated Freddie during this time period.  Bless them all.

--------------------

1st December 1987

London

Voyeur POV

Freddie switched on the bathroom light and walked over to the sink.  Avoiding looking in the mirror as he brushed his teeth.  Always easing his way into seeing what his face looked like these days.   It was a stark contrast to how it had appeared only a year ago.  His smooth and youthful skin had been reduced to a puffy red surface.  Bloated from steroids and from treatments but still marked by the undeniable purple lesion that adorned the area above his jaw.

He took a clean flannel and gently washed his face.  Taking great care as he patted it dry.  After grooming his hair, he stepped into his dressing room.  Selecting a pale blue track suit and a ball cap.  He sat and placed his socks on his feet.  His legs aching and his body tired as he tied his shoelaces.   Freddie chose a pair of sunglasses and then stepped out of the room.  Heading downstairs in the low lit hallway.  The house still dark.  The world still asleep.

The car was always there waiting for him.  He could rely on Terry for his punctuality and his discretion.  Attributes that were even more important now then when Freddie had first secured Terry as his personal driver and sometimes body guard.  He slid into the back seat of the car.  Donning his ball cap and sunglasses as Terry turned out onto Logan Place.  There were no other cars at this time of morning.  Even the business people who occupied the other homes in this area were still in bed.  

Freddie remained silent in the back seat as Terry did the same in front.  This early hour was a time of reflection and meditation.  A time when he prepared himself for what was to come.  The car was soon turning into the access road leading to the back of Lister hospital.  Freddie observed as Terry drove up to a curb by a set of double doors.  One of the doors opened and a nurse waved to the car.  Terry watched as Freddie opened his car door and slipped out.  Following the nurse into the door and disappearing from view.  Terry switched off the car and pulled his thermos out.  Preparing to sip his tea while he waited.

This routine was now familiar.  The same quiet corridors in the stark and cold hospital.  Freddie always had his coat zipped up and his ball cap remained on as he followed the nurse to the treatment room.  Going inside as the door was closed behind them.  His coat removed and his ball cap placed next to it.  A wrap around cloth cover was placed over his shoulders as he was led into a room with an exam table.  Freddie sat down and then laid back as a door opened and a familiar face appeared.  The nurse covered Freddie with a blanket fresh from the warming machine.

"Good morning."  Dr. Stauton greeted as he came over and shook Freddie's hand.   "How are you today?"  he inquired.  

"I'm tired but managing well enough."  Freddie answered as he watched the doctor step over to the sink and wash his hands.  The nurse laid a large paper sheet over Freddie's chest.  She held another one up.

"Are you ready?"  she asked him as Freddie nodded and she laid the sheet over his face.  This one contained a cutout in the middle for his face to peer through.  

"Let's get started then."  Dr. Stauton advised as Freddie laid still on the table.  Enduring another treatment.

He had been introduced to Richard C.D. Stauton, M.D., by his specialist, Dr. Brian Gazzard.  Dr. Stauton was a highly qualified dermatologist in private practice.  He was the one doctor he was assured could help treat the lesions that had started appearing on his face.  Dr. Gazzard, a specialist Freddie was referred to by his G.P., was quickly becoming the expert on AIDS in London.   An expert Freddie needed if he was fight the virus attacking his body and win.