Y/n's POV:
I wake up to the ring tone of my phone, which is buried under one of my shirts across the room.
I check the clock seeing is 3:30 in the morning, which causes me to be a little irritated. I rub the sleep away from my eyes and groggily walk over to the pile of clothes on my floor, half remembering what happened between me and shawn just hours before.
My phone stops going off and my screen says I have 3 missed calls from shawn, and Mate's date text he sent me while me and shawn were fighting.
The memory of our friendship practically ending makes a lump rush to my throat. I know he's been acting different as far as being more flirty, and catching my attention more, but I can't just leave matt, and besides even if I did admit the feelings I have for shawn, it would make things way more complicated than they need to be. I love him more than I'll ever love Matt, but he just can't know.
But most of all How could I have been so stupid as to kick the person who has been there for me out of my house?
I open Matt's text first, knowing he'll be asleep at this hour, and I know he'll ask me why I responded so late tomorrow,
Y/n: sorry Matt I can't tomorrow. A lot happened that I need to figure out. I'll see you at school.
I sigh, clicking on me and Shawn's messages again, reading what he sent me over and over again.
I know he's a real friend but I've never seen him act so aggressive at me before.
I go to the call app and click on his contact, sending shivers down my spine. Maybe I shouldn't have called, I should've waited until school why did I do this now?
On the third ring shawn picks up with a shaky, "hello?"
I whimper at the tears that I'm trying so hard to hold back, I don't want to lose him, i can never lose him.
"Shawn I'm sorry,"i breathe out, covering my mouth with my hand, afraid he'll know i'm about to cry if i don't. He sounds like hell, like he just went through it.
"God y/n I could never tell you how sorry I am." I can imagine him sitting on his bed, his eyes puffy and red, with dried tears on his cheek. It makes me want to cry even more than I have been.
"It wasn't fair," i whisper to him, wiping my eyes and sniffling, "it wasn't fair what I did to you. If you didn't want to tell me, I shouldn't have pushed you." I cry out, not caring anymore if he can hear me, he needs to know how much I miss him. Besides he has seen me cry countless times before.
"The thing is," His voice cracks, and he sounds small in his words, "i want to tell you and I am, right now I'm going to tell you and it's taking everything in me y/n just know that, be gentle okay?"
I hug myself at the words he just spoke. He's asking me to take caution with his heart, he's trusting me with everything.
"I promise," i half smile, knowing that he knows I won't break that promise.
"I'm going to be straight forward with this," he sighs, gaining confidence for what he's about to say, "i love you y/n, always have always will. I love you as more than a best friend, than a sister, I love you as i want to be by your side every minute of the day, and have you in my arms. I think about you and your pretty eyes non-stop and how much I'd love to kiss you, but I hold back because you have Matt and I don't want to ruin that for you. I knew this since the first week we met back in 7th grade, some jack ass knocked me into a locker and I've never seen someone get so protective over someone they haven't even talked to before. You have a place in my heart that no one can take. And that darling, was what I wanted to say." He takes a huge breath after, leaving me speechless, and in tears.
"I love you too shawn," i whisper, crying happy tears and laughing at the same time. I hear him let out some sort of victory laugh, of pure joy at my words.
"You have no idea how amazing this feels," he says breathlessly through the phone, causing me to smile wider.
"Oh but I do shawn," my voice going high, "because I've felt that way for as long as you."
"And that y/n, is amazing."
________________________________________~I'm a really shitty friend :"))))))))))
~leah
