Chapter 1

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**Flashback**

I was on the computer waiting for the Demi Concert tickets to go on sale, I was using my credit card for online shopping. I invited my best friend Audrey over, so we could go to the concert together. They were going on sale in five minutes. I was super excited and Audrey was calming me down.

"Calm down, Karoline, it's just a concert," Audrey almost demanded.

"You're not a lovatic, you don't worship her," I said defensively.

"Okay, Okay, let's agree to disagree," she suggested before a big fight started.

"Alright," that conversation was stupid and useless. She knew that I was a lovatic, yet she still found the time to criticize me about it. My phone started buzzing, marking thirty seconds before they went on sale.

I had my eye on the computer and then they went on sale. As fast as I could I got two all access passes. I purchased them and got really excited. I did a little dance and then got off my laptop.

**End of flashback**

I woke up to the sound of screaming. I should have been used to this by now, it was my mom screaming, probably because something my dad did. It was always me or my mom, he decided to hit us, scream at us, abuse us. It happened to be my mom that time and I went downstairs to check if everything was okay. It wasn't, I had dreaded the sight that I had seen almost everyday of my life for several years, my mom and dad were drunk. They looked at me and I knew I had it coming. By now, I should have known to stay in my room.

My dad was the owner of some important company and my mom was a fashion designer, or an ex-fashion designer. Both my parents were alcoholics my mom got my dad into the alcohol. I hated it. We had money to swim in, but their thirteen year old daughter was unhappy.

My dad came and grabbed me by my hair. I started screaming. It hurt, I felt like my head was on fire.

"Shut-up. Why did you come downstairs?," he slurred his words. He wasn't that drunk, he could still walk straight, he was just drunk enough to have his words to start slurring.

"I-I wanted t-to know what was going o-on," I stuttered. I was scared, I didn't know what he would do. Sometimes he would yell at me, others I would get a full on beating. Honestly the yelling hurt more. During those rages he puts me down calling me names that no parent should ever say to their child.

He threw me down and started kicking me, I didn't do anything wrong, but in his mind I guess that I did. I shouldn't have come downstairs, I knew this and I still came. After he was done and left I struggled to get up and looked at my mom. She slapped me across the face, I knew there would be a bruise there the next day. I slowly walked upstairs, due to the pain that I could barely cope with. I locked the door. I went to my bathroom, and bent down, my deepest secret. I didn't even have to hide them, I opened the drawer and stared at my blades. I grabbed a towel and went through what I had been going through, what seemed like forever. I took the pain that everyone caused me out on myself. I traced the blade across my leg, not making and incision, but just making a little mark. I wanted to, but was it worth it? The next day I was to be in North Wyoming waiting for Demi's concert. I promised myself that would be the last time I would do it, and when I got to the north part of the state, I would get rid of them forever. This would be my last time I thought, and at that I repositioned my blade and pressed it across my leg. I did it many times and when I was done it looked horrible. I got a towel and wiped it away. I was the only one who would ever know about my secret. I wasn't satisfied so I moved on to my wrist, which I almost never did and did it many times there. I was officially done forever. I got up and put on some comfortable clothes and went to bed.

I woke up the next morning and thank god my parents were somewhere doing something else. I called Ryan and told him to pick me up. He would be here in less than thirty minutes. I got the last things I needed and made sure I had my passes and I went downstairs to wait. I only had to wait for five minutes before he arrived.

Ryan, my driver, is going with me to pick up Audrey. She didn't live too far, but not in my neighborhood. I had to drive almost five hours to get to the concert. I was really surprised that Demi actually decided to come here, no one comes here. It was always little bands and never anyone who I even cared to pay to listen to. The concert was the next day, but I wanted to get there to do some pre-concert stuff. I waited in the car while Ryan went to get Audrey.

We drove to the hotel we were staying at, I was going to do what I had promised the next morning. It was going to be hard, but I needed to do it.

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