Insanity (Sequel To Madness)

Reunions

I hear Josh chase after me and call my name, but I ignore him while I speed walk towards my destination. Even though Shane made me leave him behind, I'm not going to accept that. Josh catches me and grabs me by my arm and spins me around, stopping me from going any further.
"What was that about?" He asks me with an urgency in his voice. I shake my head and wipe the tears from my face.
"I... I've had a rough... Really, really rough past weeks, and I'm not over it yet. Yes, I do remember you, and I care about you, but right now, I don't love you. I don't know who you grew up to be, and I'm still trying to find that out. However, the man that I did love for the past year was killed by that kids' brother and... And I'm going to go get him and take him with me back to 6 so that I can go yell at my fake husband about disowning my childhood friend who I thought was dead. Now, if you'll excuse me." I demand while I pull my arm from his grasp and continue on my path.
"Wait, so you're grabbing this guys' corpse?" Josh asks me while he jogs to catch up with me.
"Yes, that's the only piece of him I have left, and I plan on keeping it." I explain, slightly feeling my body get tired from my sudden fast pace.
"Well, then I'll help you." Josh tells me as he catches up with me and walks alongside me.
"Thanks, Josh..." I whisper just like I had as the small, scared child that I used to be. On our way towards my old home, I continue to feel Josh attempt to grip my hand, but every time I avoid it with ease. I don't know why he thinks this is a good idea, since I've already told him that I do not love him, and my heart belongs to someone else, but I avoid it non-the-less. I find my home where it always has been, but it causes dread to find me and send chills up my spin from knowing what, or rather who, waits for me inside. Josh looks at me with curiosity in his eyes and then takes in a breath.
"Are you okay?" He asks me with a calm type of concern. I look up at him and shake my head lightly.
"Not really, since the dead love of my life has been rotting away in that house for the past few days." I explain with a shaky sensation in my throat. Josh nods and places his hand on my back and begins to slowly rub up and down on it.
"If you don't want to go in there we don't have to." Josh tells me while he kisses the top of my head. I shake him off me and hold back any emotional actions my body wants to take and walk towards the house. I'm brave, I'm strong, and I can face this just like I can do with everything else. I walk up the steps with shaky legs and push open the unlocked door. It had been cracked open, I suppose the last one out wasn't strong enough even to close the door after what had happened to us that day. I'm not able to enter when the door first creaks it's way open. I have to take a few very deep breathes before I feel prepared to slowly walk inside. The smell is almost intoxicating, and I already know why, corpses smell quite a bit after all. I feel myself lose balance, and I grip onto the wall for a moment to recover myself. Partly from the fumes that invade the air and partly from my memories that continue to haunt my mind. Josh continues to follow me and lightly places his hands on my waist as if that would stabilize me. Needless to say, it doesn't soothe me at all. I rub my eyes with the back of my hand while my other supports my weight against the wall. I take in a deep breath through my mouth and shake my head from side to side in my hand and feel my legs shake under me. 
"Hey, it's okay. I got you, okay?" Josh whispers with hot breath sticking to parts of my neck and my lower ear. I shake my head and once again, push Josh off of me and walk forward, around the corner and slowly, very slowly, I allow my head to look ahead towards the couch. In that exact moment my eyes fill with tears and they slip down my cheeks. As I look at Jack, I see pieces of his skin falling from his body and dried blood dripping from his nose and mouth. A single flower sits atop his hands that are crossed across his body. The guys really gave him a makeover after I left. His eyes, however, are peacefully closed, just as they normally would be when he would sleep next to me with his arm lazily wrapped around my waist. I miss those days, when we could sleep soundly next to one another and get distracted from all worries of our daily lives. All the nights when I would lay against his chest while Jack's fingers slowly ran themselves through my matted hair. I wish more than anything to make it a reality once more, but as I stare at Jack's now roting corpse, I see how it can never be. Josh snakes his head around the corner with his hand over his nose. His eyes widen at the sight of my beloved, and I simply stare at him and slowly take steps towards him. I place my fingertips on the edge of the couch and slide them down to his cheek. His skin is soft, much softer than ever before. It feels delicate, as if it would break at the slightest touch.
"Jack..." I mumble his name as another tear slides down my cheek.
"You're still beautiful, even like this you are." I whisper while I gently run my fingertips to his hair and run through it slowly. 
"I hate to say this, but I don't think we will be able to bring him with us since he's like this." Josh comments in a soft, smooth voice.
"I know... But I still have to say goodbye... And I've never been good with that." I respond, still trying to hold back the tears in my eyes as I look down at him. 
"Should I give you a minute?" Josh asks me. He probably thinks I'm weird, or overreacting. Either way, it makes him uncomfortable, as it is clear to see. I nod slowly in response and place my other hand on the edge of the couch lazily. 
"I have to admit, if you told me this is how it would all end for us, I'd call you a liar and playfully hit your arm like I did when you told a bad joke." I whisper to Jack's body while Josh exits the house and waits for me outside. I walk around to the side of the couch and sit on the ground next to him and lazily grab his hand. 
"Don't expect am amazing last goodbye, I have nothing planned and I've always been bad at saying goodbye anyways. But... I can't just make this short and simple, since this will be out last. You know... I guess I'll start with what I wanted to tell you all this time. Y'know, I've always thought of you as smart, but your last move was the dumbest thing you've ever done. Ian wanted me to hurt Shane. You weren't supposed to be involved at all, and you definitely weren't supposed to be killed. And I know what you'd say: well, it was my choice to protect you, Violet. But what if I wanted to protect you? That was what I was supposed to do, and I failed at my one job. And the one thing that could help me right now is you, but thanks to your choice to protect me, that can't happen anymore. I miss you, Jack. I'm going to miss you until the end of my days, and you already know why. It's the same reason why I kept choosing you over, and over, and over again. I love you, Jack, more than anyone else in my world. I've done everything in my power to remember you and continue to believe that we'll meet again... However... Whenever I think about that now, all I'll see in my mind is your dead corpse rotting away here. And, like you and everyone else keeps telling me, I have to learn how to let you go. The thing about that though is that I hate that. I never want to leave anyone behind, but when I leave here today, I'll try to move on with my life. I'll try to live a full life, and when I see you again, whatever way it may be, I'll be sure to tell you all about it, just like you wanted. I have to warn you though, I'm still going to cry when I think of you, and get pissed at myself and go kill things, but I'll live through it... Like I always have. That, is my promise, Jack, and I'm going to keep it to you in hopes that one day you and I can sit down and talk about all of it together." I feel more and more tears sliding down my cheeks and I wipe them with the back of my hand as I squeeze Jack's slightly.
"God, I really suck at goodbyes. But, this is the best I can do, so you'll have to deal with that." I mumble as I slowly guide my hand out of Jack's and use it to push myself to my feet.
"Goodbye, Jack. I'm going to keep my promise, no matter what."