Secret

Sixty Six

{edited}

Harry POV

I lay on my bed Monday night. My insides are weak and I genuinely hate myself.

I hate that I made the deal with Karen.

I hate that I didn't tell May sooner.

I hate that my fear of losing May is now my reality.

And it's all my fault.

I roll over to my side and sigh. It's been three days since she's found out. Within those three days I've felt dead in the inside.

I'm so used to texting her everyday. Now, I'll be lucky if she looks at me in the hallway.

I have no right to be upset. I know that, it's obvious. It's not like I can talk to Sadie about this anyways. She barely talks to me anymore.

Maybe this is what I deserve. To have no one. It isn't maybe, this is what I deserve.

May POV

These three days have felt like 3 years.

I miss Harry. I wish I didn't.

I miss his texts or his kisses. I just miss him. Thinking about him though makes me sick. I feel like it's foolish for me to even remotely think that there is a possibility that he didn't tell Karen about anything between us.

Since the beginning I always questioned him and why he was talking to me. I wish I just kept on with my gut feeling. Then again, I always do this. I also scold myself for stuff that I can't help. Like this, I didn't know. And I'm acting like I should've.

"How are ya doing?" Adam asks as I sit in his bedroom.

"Shitty." I mutter. "You?"

"Shitty because you're shitty." His head tilts. "What are you thinking about?"

"What I've been thinking about for the past days." I huff.

"Have you talked to him since he came over?"

"No." I say.

"Do you want too?"

"I don't know what I want. I don't know if I should believe him or if I should just let myself believe that everything was a lie." I groan. "What do you think?"

"I don't want to persuade you." Adam says and I narrow my eyes at him. "I think you need time to just let everything sink in."

"And?"

"And...eventually forgive him." Adam bites his lip. "He wouldn't be this sad too if it was all for a bet, May. He genuinely looks as broken as you. I think his heart was in the right place for not telling you. It wasn't because he wanted too keep playing with you. Harry didn't want to hurt you and make you like this. But at least he was going to tell you the day Karen said something." Adam finishes. "So that's my opinion. But you figure out what you want to do."

I fall back into Adam's bed. "Can I ask you something?" He asks.

"Yes."