One Life

Chapter 42 ~Pain~

Songs For Chapter:

Nicki Minaj- Pills n' Potions

Beyonce- Broken-Hearted Girl

Rixton- Hotel Ceiling

Demi Lovato- Skyscraper

Your P.O.V

I woke up to Justin's strong arms wrapped around me. I smile and flicker my eyes open.

Wait.

Justin isn't here. Justin's somewhere in California probably cheating. I gasp as my memory comes back. I slept with that guy Lance last night.

I quickly get up and run to my clothes which were laying on the floor. I quickly put them on, grabbing my stuff then rush out the room not waking him.

I run down to my car noticing mine was the only one parked in the freeway. I run to it and get in.

I feel disgusting, like a hoe. My boyfriend cheated on me and I just did the same. Actually he's not my boyfriend anymore, so I didn't do shit.

I go into my bag and search for my phone but I couldn't find it. Oh yeah I forgot I didn't take it with me, it's still on the couch. I hope my parents didn't notice I was gone or they'd probably disown me.

I arrive at my driveway and slowly approach the front door. I was dubious at first but I finally stuck the key into the lock. I slowly open the front door relieved when I don't see anyone standing in front of it.

I slowly shut the door trying not to make any noise. I lightly sigh walking into the living room.

"Where the hell have you been!?" I hear a deep voice say from the living room. I jump holding my heart in my hand.

"Don't ignore me! Do you know how worried we all were?" Jones says. "Do you know what time it is?" Trevor yells.

I shush them both hoping my parents weren't awake. "How the hell did you get in here," I whisper. "Doesn't matter, where'd you go?" "Jones just let me handle it," India says. She looks at me waiting for me to explain.

"How did you get in here?" "You gave me your key remember?" She says making me strongly regret that decision. "Are you okay," she asks me. "I'm fine," I say annoyed rolling my eyes.

"Justin has been calling you nonstop. He's so worried about you," she says in a sad tone infuriating me. "Forget about Justin!" I finally break out giving her the hint that we're having problems and he is the cause why I wasn't home.

"Justin can just worry about all his other hoes, he doesn't care about me!" I yell. I fast walk upstairs to my room and shut my door closed. I hear footsteps lurking towards the door. "Y/n open the door and talk to me," I hear Jones subtle voice from behind the door.

I begin to sob, real tears. After holding it in since yesterday I finally couldn't hold it anymore. Justin really did break my heart.

I understand that we both are across the country from each other but I didn't think he would actually cheat on me after what he said and from the love and affection he has shown me.

I should've known this wouldn't of lasted, how could it? It barely seemed real. Maybe this is a sign. I'm not met to be in a relationship. I'm just not loved that way and I'm tired of having to go through all the heartaches and pains when I already know I'm worthless.

My mind keeps thinking about the razor laying on the bathroom tile but my heart keeps telling me I'm better than it and I will overcome it. The more that I think about how my celebrity crush broke me the more I want to hurt myself for being so damn worthless.

I finally walk into the bathroom locking the door shut. I pick up the razor off of the floor and begin to glide is against my wrist causing it to bleed. I hiss but suddenly feel relieved after.

I do it two more times then begin to cry. I'm so broken and I don't even know how to handle it. I hear my bedroom door open but I don't even care.

"Y/n open the door!" India yells. She's the only one who knew I cut myself after Diggy. She was the one who found me crying in my bathroom last time. I hear her talking to someone else frantically and all of a sudden the door rams open.

Jones picks me up off the floor in shock laying me on my bed. I look over at India and see tears falling out of her eyes. "I couldn't overcome it," I tell her in a shaky voice. I watch as Jones face turns red with rage.

I know if Jones sees Justin again he'll fight him. I'm like his little sister and he's never seen me like this. Hopefully my actual brother doesn't find out or Trevor, Jones, and my brother will find him and probably put him in a hospital room.

Speaking of hospitals I hope he went. Why am I still caring about his health when he's ruined mine? I have to stop.

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I just wanted you guys to know, if you cut yourself because your hurting, don't. Someone out there loves you even though you think no one does. There's at least two people who love you, God, and me. God will help you through your situation and I'll always love you regardless how well I know you or not.