Remember

Part 94: No Needs Left

"Are you going to say anything?" Sawyer questions.

I had a moment of weakness. Nostalgia hit me hard. But as soon as I realized what I did, I pushed Sawyer out into the hallway and slammed the door in his face.

I think I cried for about an hour. Sawyer stopped banging on the door after about twenty minutes.

How am I going to explain this to Carter? All of a sudden, a man I hardly know, comes back into my life and I kiss him....

When I went to check to see if Sawyer was still there, he was. He was leaning against my door, waiting. He'd knew I'd open the door eventually.

"I shouldn't have done that..." I hear him say. "Fuck." He whispers under his breath.

He's sitting across from me on the dining room table, a glass of water tightly held in his hand. My focus is on his hand and all the new tattoos he got.

I pictured myself in this situation a thousand times, knowing what to say and how to react, but now that it's happening I'm stuck. I still don't believe he's actually here, sitting across from me.

I still have this raging anger inside of me and I don't know how to deal with it.

I take a sip of my water and under my left eye, a small twitch occurs.

"Opal?" Sawyer says, and he tries to reach out for my hand. I pull away and stare at the spot my hand was seconds ago.

One half of me wants to strangle Sawyer and the other half wants to set him on fire. I snap out of my dark thoughts and watch as he runs his hands through his hair.

"I'll wait." He says, irritation playing at his features. I slowly get up and open a package of popcorn and pop it into the microwave. I know when Sawyer is frustrated any constant noise gets him more upset.

The microwave hums loudly as we both stare at each other silently. He glares at me, knowing exactly what I'm doing.

I look away and watch the popcorn bag spinning inside the microwave.

"If you're hungry, we can go get food." He offers, but I ignore him, my eyebrows creasing together at the sound of his voice. I walk away to my room. It's way too hot in my apartment, I need to change into something fresh.

I hear the microwave beep and the scraping of the kitchen chair and the smell of popcorn. He's getting out the bag of popcorn.

I rush to my drawer and grab a white tank top and running shorts. Sawyer is quiet as I change and quickly put my hair into a braid. There's no sound coming from the kitchen, he's too quiet.

"Sawyer?" I question, trying to remember if I ignored the sound of the front door opening and closing.

"What?"

"Oh, you're still here." I voice out, sounding less disappointed than intended. As I finish up my braid, I see Sawyers curly set of hair pop in first and he leans against my bed room door.

I catch his eyes scanning my body, and he turns away.

"Nope, haven't left." He says, and a bowl of pop corn is in his hands.

I don't look at him and grab the bowl out of his hand. He rolls his eyes and he follows me back to the living room where I plop down onto the couch.

"I'm as stubborn as you darling." He says with a mischievous smile and he leans his head back and closes his eyes.

He's waiting for me to burst. He wants me to. My plan is to wait until he's fully asleep so I can leave. I can't think with him here, I need Carter.