Watch N' Learn 3

Chapter 40

Chapter 40

Kayla

I sat in front of my dad and Zoey because I'm at my breaking point and I'm ready to end it all so I figured I might as well talk to them before things get crazy. My mom told me she was coming to get me for the weekend and I would die before I ever go back with her.

"You talk to your mom?" My dad asked staring at me as he sat on the couch beside Zoey.

"Yes, she said that she was coming to get me for the weekend, but I told her that I am not going with her. She's trying to force me." I said.

"Why don't you want to go? You haven't seen her in a minute." He said.

I looked down at my hands because I got so nervous. 

"I really need to tell you something dad, but you have to promise that you won't get mad and act crazy." I said never looking up at them.

"I can't promise that because I don't what it is that you're going to tell me. I'll try but I can't guarantee anything."

Zoey stared at me like she knew something was really wrong but she didn't say anything. My phone began ringing and I jumped a little. I saw that it was my mom and I was a bit hesitant to answer but I did anyways.

"Hello?" I answered.

"Hey, baby. I just wanted to let you know that I'll be in town early in the morning. I wanna spend some time with you before we head out." My mom said.

I didn't feel like arguing with her. "Okay, I'll talk to you later." 

I hung up in her face.

"So what's up?" My dad asked.

"Ummm....when I was 12 years old...I was raped by mom's boyfriends. It happened so many times after the first and she let them. They drugged me and took advantage of me. I begged her to make them stop every time. I told her I would do anything she wanted if she made them stop but she didn't care. Sometimes she'd watch. I've been withdrawn from everything and I hate myself. I wish I was dead. I'm suffering from depression and anxiety. I have flashbacks of the assaults at least 3 times a day. I don't know how to function. I don't know how to channel my emotions. I don't know how to do anything. I feel unloved. I'm so ashamed and embarrassed. I'm sorry for everything that I have done...you just don't understand how hard it is to live every day with this trauma. I endured it for years and I begged you...I begged you to take me from her but you didn't..." I said wiping tears from my eyes.

I looked at them and Zoey eyes were red and she came and sat next to me and wrapped her arms around me. Dad's face just looked so empty. I couldn't tell what he was thinking.

"I'm so sorry Kayla. We love you. We had no idea this was going on." Zoey said holding onto me tightly. She had never embraced me like this before.

I began crying uncontrollably and I felt like I couldn't breathe almost.

"They tortured me and nobody stopped them. Nobody helped me. I begged and begged. Nobody did anything." I cried.

"I know what it feels like sweetheart and it's not something you just get over. It takes time and we'll work through it. I promise. I won't let anyone hurt you again." Zoey told me.