"Gerard, I love you!" called Frank from the other side of the rehearsal room, and he plugged his guitar into one of the amps.
As he bent over, the smallest bit of pink material showed in the small space between his jeans and shirt. Gerard sighed softly and pretended he hadn't heard.
He hated Frank and the way he felt - he really did. It had been like this for as long as Gerard could remember - Frank had always been very open about his feelings towards Gerard. Gerard was as straight as a ruler and Frank was gayer than George Michael. And Frank was hopelessly in love with Gerard...this guy who would never love him back.
Things had gotten so bad between Frank and Gerard that Gerard had actually considered quitting the band on more than one occasion. But Gerard loved what he did and didn't ever want to give it up. It just seemed like a big price to pay.
Frank got so annoyed with Gerard sometimes - the fact that Gerard was even against his sexuality got right up his nose. So what if he was gay and had feelings for Gerard? He didn't need to be so damn negative!
But Frank just couldn't help himself - there was something about negative Gerard that made him irresistible. Frank couldn't help feeling the way he did. But he hated what Gerard was putting him through.
"Hey Gerard!" Frank called. "Come over here! We're all ready to start! I don't bite, you know!"
Gerard dragged his mic across the floor. He then wordlessly connected the black chord into one of his amps.
"That's my boy!" Frank grinned, and patted him on the shoulder. Gerard instinctively moved away and Frank sighed loudly.
But then MIkey counted them in and they ran through "I'm Not Okay (Trust Me)" very quickly, because Ray had to rush off to some family dinner in five minutes. Once Ray had shot off, Frank slowly put his stuff away, hoping for a chance to help Gerard out.
Boband Mikey were soon off and left Gerard to struggle with cleaning the mess beforehand.
"Need some help?" Frank asked playfully. Gerard rolled his eyes and said nothing.
Frank picked the biggest amp up and carried it all the way to Gerard's car. Once they were both at the car, Gerard put the other amp on the floor and scrabbled hastily in his pockets for his keys - being alone with Frank made him feel uneasy.
"Fuck!" hissed Gerard suddenly, and he kicked one of the tyres of his car.
He pressed his face up against the car window and swore again.
"I locked my keys in the car! My house keys and my mobile are in there as well!"
"Do you want to call a locksmith?" Frank asked, and chucked his mobile to Gerard.
Gerard caught it and gave Frank a thankful nod. Frank was just happy to be with Gerard because there could be a chance that Gerard could stop over at his house if the locksmith was busy.
♥
"I don't want a flaming peep from you tonight. You've been warned now!" Gerard warned Frank as they drove in Frank's car.
The locksmith wasn't able to get to Gerard until tomorrow so Frank had been kind enough to suggest that Gerard should stop over at his overnight.
Good for Frank. Not so good for Gerard, he hadn't been keen on the idea but it was his only option so he'd had to accept. And he'd already warned Frank about funny business.
When they got to Frank's place it was already 8:30.
"We could have an early night if you want!" Frank said casually as he stepped into his house. "My bed is really comfy and there's more than enough room for the two of us."
"Frank!" Gerard spat dangerously.
"Chill dude. You're sleeping on the sofa. Want to watch a DVD to pass the time?" Gerard shrugged and sat on the sofa.
Frank knelt down and the pink material flashed slightly before he sat up and plonked himself on the sofa next to Gerard...dangerously close to him. Gerard shuffled up the sofa as far as he could, and Frank moved over a little more. Gerard exhaled sharply, stood up, and then took a deep breathe.
"For god's sake! Just leave me alone! I'm not gay and I never will be! It's unnatural, and it's weird!" Gerard snapped. "What the hell is your problem?!"
Frank got to his feet and stormed out of the room and into the kitchen. He slammed the door behind himself and the whole house seemed to shake with the impact.
Gerard looked gingerly at his feet. He hadn't meant to upset Frank - he'd only wanted Frank to understand that they'd never be an item. Gerard walked gingerly to the door and knocked quietly on it.
"Frank?" he called into the door, and pressed his ear to it. He couldn't hear anything so he called Frank's name again. And there was still no answer. Gerard pushed the door open slowly, fully expecting Frank to run at him and hit him.
But instead, Gerard just saw him bent over the kitchen surface, next to the medicine cabinet. Gerard ran to the side of Frank and was shocked to see Frank shovelling pill after pill into his mouth.
"Fuck's sake! Stop taking those things, you'll kill yourself!" Gerard yelled and grabbed the pill container from Frank.
Frank lunged at Gerard and wrestled him to the floor. He pinned Gerard to the ground and the pill container rolled silently away.
"You don't fucking understand, do you? You've never understood me, have you? And you probably never will!" Frank growled. "And I'd probably kill myself if I didn't take these bloody things. Just read the label."
Frank slowly unpinned Gerard from the floor and chucked the container to him. He read the label and gasped - they were pills for depression.
"But you always seem so happy and..."
"I can hide behind a smile so easily it isn't even funny." Frank interrupted. "I've been taking these things ever since you began to mess with my mind and you've made me feel like I'm all wrong. Every time you tell me that you hate me, or that you and me will never be together, it cuts meet deeper and deeper each time. And you never understand how much you hurt me. Because all you ever think about is yourself and your reputation."
"I'm sorry..." Gerard murmured, getting quieter and quieter.
"No you're not." Frank stated, and he reached for the pills again. "I thought you'd gone as low as you could...but after tonight...whoah...I must have thought wrong. I tell you what, even if I take this whole container of pills I'll still feel like crap."
There were no words to explain what Gerard was going through now. He wished he could somehow make everything better, but by now the damage had been done. Gerard knew that it was all his fault, so in an attempt to repair Frank's broken heart, he reached to him and gave him a kiss on the lips.
Frank pushed Gerard away, and he felt surprised that he'd actually done that - he'd waited for this moment for years and now he was doing the opposite of what had happened in his dreams.
"What are you doing? I thought this was what you wanted!" Gerard said in disbelief.
"I don't trust you." Frank stated. "I've discovered the true you tonight, and I've had enough of your games. You'll only hurt me more. Face it, you just did that out of sympathy, you've said yourself that you don't feel the same as I do. Many times. I can't believe I'm saying this, Gerard, but I hate you."
