My Thoughts

5 months later.

Its been five months and now I'm scared to look at you. Back then I could stare and you'd do nothing but laugh and punch me lightly in the arm. Five months ago you'd be the best person id know and now I refuse to say Any different. Instead you encourage me to go off on my own and find someone else. I've been lying recently even though I told you I wouldn't. I've been telling people I'm over you but really I still sit st home crying with you being the only thing in my mind. I've been writing all the things I said to you that lead us down this path. That lead us In such opposite directions. Five months later and I feel alone and helpless every night. I fall into a sleep while my tears tumble down my face wishing for what could never happen. I still look at you from across the class. I still worry about you . I still feel chills down my spine and my hands can't help but curl up into fists whenever I see you with other guys. I've tried what you told me but no matter what I say or how many smiles I fake I still want you. No one I'd quite like you. No one pulls me in and interests me quite like you do. No one can stop this. I know you catch me looking. I know you get uncomfortable when I come over to o hear one of the few things can bring me joy. I know its creepy. I know its wrong. But I can't help it. I always hover my fingers over my screen trying to text you. I know I shouldn't have sent this. But I feel as though you need to know.

Happy five months.