My Thoughts

I cant believe this.

I stand on the side of the road, face red and covered in tears. I'm sick of this distant talking, inches apart from each other whispering about our dreams. You tell me lie after lie about what you want with me. I smile. That's my dream, your a liar and a thief. You said that shit and now look where we are. Over a year after it all ended and I'm still making excuses to walk past your house hoping you see me and think about me. You understand how badly I needed you and all you did was push and push until I fell off the edge. I was drowning and you smiled and watched. You piled up these problems I was carrying and all I did was smile and agree as you loaded off your pile onto mine and now I'm sat here crying on the side of the road.

For a moment I forgot you existed. To be truthful it was the happiest I was all day. I found out a few things about you that I wasn't even surprised with. I'm just sick of your shit. You threw me out and now I've hit obstacle after obstacle and it seems every single one gets bigger and bigger and I can't take it. I'm staring at the mountain I have to climb on the other side of the road. I see headlights. I step out. The metal from the front of the car slams into my legs and I fly through the windscreen, straight through the car to the other side. My eyes close.

My eyes spilt open and I'm in a room. My bedroom. I slowly rise to my feet. My clothes are covered in blood, torn and glass is sticking out if ever inch of my body. I don't feel any of it. I move my way to the door and my hand claps the handle. I turn it and I pull. Nothing. The door doesn't have a lock. I pull again. Nothing. I turn and go to the window, I climb on top of my bed and look out. I see a hospital room. My hand grab onto the handle and it turns and I try to push it open. Nothing. I look at the hospital room. There's a bed with me in it. My eyes closed. I'm drenched in blood and tears. No ones there.

I'm laying alone. A beep every few seconds. No doctor. No family. No friends. Just me in a bed, alone. A tear bunches up in my eye. I watch as my heart picks up. Faster. Faster. And then. It stops. I look down at the windowsill. I take a breath. I'm sorry.