My Thoughts

Bridge

This is it... huh. Leaned over the railing that confines the bridge with its safety precautions, a breath of the cold air slips in through my nostrils then in a huff, it all flies straight back out. A drop of cold sweat slips from my temple and I turn to the side of the bridge I've been hoping to see her walk up, in her coat, just to take my hand in hers. Look me in the eyes and smile. And walk me back to her house. I know it'll never happen. Just her soft embrace, that feeling of being wanted, those mornings of waking up turning and burying my face in the pillow next to her. I guess I messed it up again. Another sweep of cold air slips into my nostrils except my jaw gives out, drops, and then the breath weasels out in a mist. My fingers lift one by one and then clamp down onto the railing.

Blinding headlights shine into my eyes, i turn my head and wince my eyes as they begin to water. The light mixed with the cold air makes it hard to keep it in. My mind drifts from person to person. The girl that complimented me today simmers in my mind. In the spotlight of my brain i think about her for a moment. A sigh slips from my lips and my jaw stays lowered. She sits there, smiles and my head starts to hurt. My eyes close and She twirls, her dress lifts and falls by the air rushing under it. A smile slips onto her lips and its contagious. A tear breaks through my eyelids and falls down past my nose and drips off the end. My smile lowers, my cheeks become weak and i sniffle. My breath shakes and my eyelids split open.

I take off my bag and drop it next to me. I take a second before i realize what's about to happen. My fists clench and then release in a moment. I close my eyes. I see her, again she twirls and smiles and giggles. I smile. My eyes open, and the headlights blind me once again. I launch off one foot and grab the top of the railing, my right foot pushes off the ground and i swing my hips over the railing. Goodbye.