All the secrets of a fangirl | B. E. Story |

80.O Time will be frozen for us.

Billie's p.o.v

"Lana?" I shouted through the house, I haven't seen her in an hour and ever since she got out of the hospital she's a hot mess. The news hit her harder then expected and she didn't expect her to forget things this fast. The silly moments became shorter and shorter, and her forgetting everything more often. I sighed when she wasn't in the bedroom, turning myself around facing the window.

I sighed at the sight, a long black haired girl sitting in the garden. Twirling the leaves of the grass around her fingers. Was I supposed to leave her alone, or did she need me? After everything that happened the last month I didn't know what to do most times. Lana was a big piece of my life, and there was no way I wanted to hurt her again. But I found it hard how to act around her lately.

Deeply inside my thoughts, walking down the stairs. Grabbing the cup of tea i've made from the kitchen counter to walk outside to Lana.

"Baby." I scared her out of her thoughts handing her the cup. Laying my hand down her neck, softly stroking up and down in circle motions. "How are you?" I asked her,

"Lately i've been more scared then ever, it feels like our time together is frozen. But the world's still turning and i'm here, living with the fact that there's gonna be a time where I don't even remember your name. Don't know where you're coming from, and our child isn't probably born at that time." Her sighing and small tears running down her cheek killed me inside. I tried to stay positive, wanting to make her feel as comfortable as she could be at this point. Making it hard to give in on the fact that what she's saying is now real life.

Today was gonna be her first session at a sortof healing therapist. He is known for his mind tricks and slowing down the dementia sickness, and giving people with this diagnosis more time together with their loved ones. "We're gonna make the best of it, and who even knows.. I made sure the team did their research right on finding the right people for you and for helping you with this illness."

A comfortable sigh full of relief left her body after my statement, giving me goosebumps when her head laid down on my shoulder. Even after all that we have been trough, we're still together and make it together to the end. "Hugo's quiet baby.." I looked up when hearing her soft voice.

"Do you want me to sing again?" Knowing her as when she said that it would mean, I had to sing for them together. Comforting her, because obviously she is still the biggest Eilish fan now isn't she.

I got up from the bench, and sat down on my knees in front of her. Hands on the side of her stomach, softly stroking in circle motions the same way I did with my wife. "I've been watching you. For some time."

Singing for Hugo and Lana, giving my best when I did. Didn't seem to notice Finneas and the family walking in, Ocean eyes was one of my favorite songs to sing. And it reminded me of the days back of me and Lana sitting inside the tourbus.

We weren't much younger back then, and I remember her sitting in front of me with her long black hair down her stomach. It was messy, and her red lipstick was all smudged over her face. After making love only the way we could, nasty, rough but loving. She'd sit in front of me, having this little smile on her face and her eyes looking at me. Asking me to do something.

I remember she wouldn't speak out on the fact that she loves when I would sing for her. "Ocean eyes.. please" I laughed at the way she stared into my eyes and tried to look innocent as hell.

I snuggled up against her at that time, closing me off from the world. Sing for her, kiss her on her forehead and enjoy the moment with my lady. This was exactly the same moment right now.

"Lana?"

I bit my lip when she looked up with tears in her eyes after finishing the song. "You're the only one I wanna wake up with every morning. You're so damn special, gorgeous, one of a kind. I promise you not to hurt you again. Be there for you this rocky time, and pull you through it." I felt Finneas hand resting on my shoulder, and my moms hand on the back of Lana's head.

"We gotta do this together.." Lana agreed with Maggies words.

We stood up insync, closing the house and locking the doors before going inside the car. I lead Lana in the backseat, closing the door and I nod at Finneas.

We both knew. This was gonna be one of the last moments where Lana would remember this the way she remembered it today..

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To be continued
Big chapters coming
Hold up ❤️