All the secrets of a fangirl | B. E. Story |

42.O Feeling nothing

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Babies. I want to tell you all that this chapter will include gun violence, depression. Suicidal thoughts, and acts. If you are triggered by it, please skip this. Since i don't want you all to be hurt or anything then that.
Love from me.
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The next few concerts have been a blast, Billie has never been performing better and she didn't seem bothered what the media has been writing the past few days we've been away from home. While we were getting ready for the show, we were having burritos. Bill was so hyped about eating them, so we had to give in. Of course.

I looked over to her and smiled while I took a bite out of my wrap, for me the last hour has been pretty excited. Sophie called me with the message that she has to go into labor, because of early contractions. It was pretty early for her to go into labor, but the doctors told her she would be okay.
The thought of her finally having a little baby made me pretty hyped about being an auntie.

Since I don't have brothers or sisters I wouldn't think I'd ever been an auntie. Lily and Kate, were pretty clear about not having kids, so for them telling me that time was a pretty big bummer.
At home i have a big ass gift for Sophie and Garret, ever since i met them almost a year ago they've been so good to me. Taking care of me whenever bringing me to their house and be the best friends i could ever ask for.

I chuckled by the thought of Billie telling me earlier that if I'd be the auntie, she'd be auntie 2.0. As you can tell, today has been a real blast. Actually, it has been since i went on-stage during Ocean Eyes. The insecure Billie i have been seeing for the past months has been gone, and i couldn't be happier.

"babe? Any news yet?" Billie asked from the other side of the table, i looked over to her burrito's laying out on her plate. She has now started on her thirth, girl was a pretty Mexican food lover.

I checked my phone for messages but there hasn't been one just yet. "No, not yet. Mark my words she will call me when you are performing." she nodded as a response before she started to talk to Denzel again.

We all enjoyed our dinner and i followed Billie afterward to the dressing room. I looked up to my phone when it buzzed again, someone is trying to contact me. But i never pick up when someone is calling me by unknown id. It's been pretty annoying but i tried to shrug it off. If someone really needs me they will call me back with their own number.

"Are you old or?" i could hear Billie yell from the end of the hallway, have i been walking that slow already?

"Shit, sorry Sherlock." i made a little run over to her when she stopped me to push me against the wall, with my hands beside my head. "i've been watching you, for some time."

"Stop the cheesy shit."

"can't stop staring-" i interrupted her by punching her softly in her belly.

"You never seem to listen, we really have to fix that." i said seductively before trying to let myself go of her grip. She was pretty shocked by my response and nodded. Her voice sounded pretty raw when she nodded and said "yeah, fuck. Show me after the show mamas."

I pushed the door open when we arrived at the dressing room, Billie's hair and stylist were already waiting. "You're late Eilish."

"Yeah because of Miller over there stopping me." when she sat down in the chair i looked at her from over the mirror. "Easy there."

I walked out of the room to meet up with Finneas, as he hasn't been the supporting act ever since we met up with Denzel Saturday, we both have been planning Billie's birthday. Today was December 17th, and the show has been moved two hours late. So that when the last songs end, it will be midnight and it will be her birthday.