Day 119

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Monday, August 3, 2020

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I just spent half of my day in an almost emotionless but not quite state, then spent the rest of the day listening to my questionable music choices and doing my writing for my schedule (less than 1,000 due for tomorrow!).

Also due to my climbing a roof and maybe the ping pong game that was more of 'hit the ball' than actual ping pong, I am sore in my thighs and upper arms. Which sucks because I live on the second floor/balcony that overlooks the living room so I have to take the stairs to get food and stuff but um, my thighs did NOT like the idea of walking down the stairs. At all. 

I stretched out a bit during the day so hopefully I'll feel better in the morning, but still. Ow!

Anyway I don't really have much to rant/vent about, so yeah, have a life update. 



Fun fact I did ballet until I was like, seven. Then it kinda got too competitive and not just about fun plus it was like, a lot of money, so I quit. 

It shows in some of my jumps and my weird placement/position of feet but like, I kept none of the grace so :/

I also used to do soccer, but it grew expensive and my teammates were.... not that nice.... so I quit! I can kick things better but other than that I kept nothing from it.

'Course, I repressed a lot of my memories from that time because I did a lot of stupid stuff plus I had some pretty toxic friends (or friends that moved away or friends who turned into toxic people or friends that grew out of me) but that definitely hasn't been carried with me subconsciously or anything! 

At least no one's told me or been able to tell me otherwise because I will never talk to a therapist unless my doctor tells my parents I should or I need to because of something actually important.


Gods, when I can, I am booking an appointment with a therapist because I just need help unpacking my past. 



Stay safe kiddos and make sure to take breaks if and when you need them.

All my love <3<3<3

~Ink

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