Beautiful Mess (Second to None Series # 1)

50

"C'mon take my hand", yumuko pa siya ng konti.

Humawak ako sa kamay niya atsaka niya ako inalalayang tumayo. Pinagpagan niya rin ang damit ko. Nakatanga lang ako sa kaniya. Hindi ko alam kung saan ako magsisimula dahil sa mga nalaman ko kanina sa mga kaibigan ko. Inabot ko ang mukha niya at hinaplos. Natigilan siya dahil doon.

"Mag-isa mo rin palang hinarap ang lahat... sorry hindi kita nasamahan", ilang beses akong napakurap para pigilan ang luha.

Malungkot siyang ngumiti sakin atsaka niya ako inaya papunta sa treehouse na dating pinuntahan namin. May mga pagkain doon katulad noong una naming punta.

"What brought you here?" sumandal siya sa pader na malapit sa nakabukas na malaking bintana.

"Marami tayong dapat pag-usapan", bumuntong hininga ako.

"Akala ko ba you want me to stay away again?"

"Akala ko rin", malungkot uli akong ngumiti.

Natahimik kaming dalawa habang tinititigan ang isa't-isa. Para kaming nagpapakiramdaman.

"So...", alanganin si Rehan.

"Ang awkward naman nito", tumawa ako. "Ganito ba talaga kapag mag-ex?" alanganin na akong napangiti.

"I couldn't have been your ex if only you stayed", malungkot siyang ngumiti.

"Sorry... Hindi ko alam na ganon pala... hindi kita inisip... sorry. I'm sorry", napatungo ako.

Hinila niya ako para yakapin. Mabibigat ang paghinga niya. Sobrang nagi-guilty na naman ako. Sobrang mahal ko siya pero sobra ko rin pala siyang nasaktan.

"Anong nangyari noong wala ako? Ikwento mo sakin lahat Rehan... para kahit papaano... kahit ngayon lang ay makahati ako sa mga pinagdaanan mo", tiningala ko siya.

Pinatalikod niya ako at pinaharap sa may bintana. Tanaw ang Taal Lake. At nagsimula siyang magkwento.

"Eiriane was under her father's command. She can't do anything but to persuade me to defend Senator Ramos, her dad, from all the accusations against him. Drugs and corruption, all the same stuffs which politicians often do. Before she even reached out for my help, I'm already investigating Senator Ramos. I'm not dumb to play their games empty handed. I'm so sick of their dirty tricks just to avoid the laws", nakapatong ang baba niya sa ulo ko habang nagkwekwento.

"I know that they'll involve you or my family if ever I won't act accordingly to what they want. I needed to entertain Eiriane even if it means I'll ignore and hurt you. I'm so sorry, love", dinampian niya ng halik ang kaliwang temple ko.

"There were people who watched you from a distance to report everything to Senator Ramos. From the fake documents of Ali, your career almost ruined and up to the car accident, it was Senator Ramos who's behind all those. Eiriane was jut his tool. She was also put behind the bars to protect her father. Bullshit right?"

"Bullshit nga", napatango ako.

"And then the day I fear the most came, you breaking up with me. The pain was unbearable... It hurts a lot to let you go... You forced me to let you go. I couldn't say no when you were so desperate to be free.. to be happy without me. To see you turning your back on me and walking away, it's my worst nightmare".

Ipinatong na niya ang ulo sa kaliwang balikat ko at doon na siya tuluyang umiyak. Umiiyak na rin ako.

"Back then, I can't protest when you wanted me to let you go. I can't complain because I wasn't there too when you desperately needed someone to lean on. I'm so sorry if I made you think that you were useless, unlovable, replaceable, a failure and unwanted. Patawad, mahal ko".