𝑺𝒑𝒆𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒓 𝑹𝒆𝒊𝒅 𝑶𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒕𝒔

I'm Not Over You

I stood in front of my mirror, swapping in between almost twenty different outfits. I wanted to look my best, not to impress anyone well not really. Spencer and I had started dating when we both started at the BAU at the same time, It was like love at first sight and before we knew it we were head over heels in love with each other. Of course, that never lasts long. We were crazy about each other one day and the next Spencer was barely talking to me, I had just been waiting to wake up one morning and he'd be gone, low and behold three weeks after he started acting strange I turned over to face him but when I reached out, he was gone. I wasn't surprised when I found that he hadn't left a note or anything I was just disappointed. It had taken me months and months of crying and wallowing to get over him, I say get over him like I actually did. I eventually just stuck my head into my work and books and didn't give myself time to think about him, I began going to the gym to distract myself and I had to admit I looked amazing. Spencer had left the BAU the same day that he left me and I was kind of glad since it meant I didn't have to leave the family I had built.

Morgan had invited us all to a huge party at his house and after hours and hours of begging from Garcia and JJ I finally agreed to attend. They had all been just as furious as me at how Reid left without explanation and they agreed that if any of them ever saw him they would murder him, and believe me by working with murderers nearly 24/7 they knew how to dispose of a body. I finally decided on a small but classy black dress with lace sleeves, I knew it was Reid's favourite but I wouldn't let anyone else know that, a small part of me was hoping he would see me there and realise how stupid he was to leave me.

I untied my hair and gave it a quick curl before carefully applying my lipstick and bolting downstairs, I had zoned out and was now running extremely late to the party so I threw on my shoes and jumped in a taxi. I was planning on drinking tonight and I didn't want to do the awkward getting a lift to pick up my car in the morning, I nervously tapped away at my purse while the taxi drove closer to Morgans house, we finally pulled up and I could see the excitement in Garcia's face when she saw my head through the window. Seconds after I climbed out the taxi I was almost thrown to the floor by Garcia wrapping her arms around me, I was unsure why she was being so protective so I pulled her away and gave her a look that meant tell-me-now. 

She gulped making her look even more suspicious, I sighed and looked her straight in the eyes.

"what is it?"

"nothing nothing at all!" her gaze kept shifting sideways and she didn't have her usual cheery manner, instead she seemed angry but upset at the same time. It was then that it clicked.

"He's here isn't he?"I groaned, trying to avoid the tears beginning to well up in my eyes was a lot harder than I thought. I wasn't sure if I wanted to punch him or kiss him, maybe both. He had left me without an explanation after dating for nearly 2 years, he was the first person I ever told I loved and when he said it back I felt like I was walking on air for days on end. I spun Garcia around and we both marched over to Morgans door, I could hear Spencer laughing somewhere close and I couldn't help but reminisce in the moments where I would make him laugh like that and he would make me laugh even harder. My thoughts were disturbed by Morgan waving his hand in front of my face, I must have zoned out yet again. I shook my head and smiled when I saw Derek there with two drinks in hand, 

"Hey!" He almost had to yell due to the sheer amount of noise coming from the other rooms,

"hey" I said quietly, staring down at the drink I had in my hand. "it's cause he's here isn't it?" he frowned slightly and looked over to where Reid was talking with Hotch, Hotch had an unimpressed look on his face that was starting to turn to anger, I loved how protective the BAU were but it sometimes got annoying. "nope I'm fine. honestly! Looks like you should go try stop Hotch from tearing Reids throat out" We both chuckled before he sprinted off and started talking to the other two. I exhaled deeply and began walking through the house, making small talk wasn't my thing but if it meant I didn't have to talk to Reid I would suck it up and deal with it.

A few hours passed and it was getting harder to avoid Spencer, I could tell he was looking for me so I scooted past loads of people and went to were everyone was dancing. Morgans house was basically a castle so of course he pretty much had a ballroom, I grabbed Garcia's hand and dragged her onto the dance floor. She complied and we ended up dancing for a while before she whispered " there's a very good looking guy that I think wants to dance with you" She winked and I just sighed, expecting to see Reid when I turned around yet I was met by a gorgeous looking guy blushing bashfully and it was strange seeing such a good looking guy not being as incredibly confident as most, it was nice to know that not everyone is a cocky idiot who thinks they're better than everyone else. He walked over to me, his confidence clearly growing yet still not at douche bag levels.

"h-hey" He stuttered out and reached his hand out for me to take, I looked around and saw that Spencer was nowhere to be seen so I stretched my hand out aswell and pulled him closer. 

"I'm Thomas by the way" 

"(Y/N)"

We danced for what felt like hours, we were in the middle of laughing at something that he said when he suddenly jolted his head. I turned mine too to see what had disturbed him and my heart suddenly jumped into my throat. Spencer Reid in the flesh. My breath got caught in my throat and Thomas seemed to notice.

"You okay?" He said, worry laced in his voice as he tightened his grip on my waist, I nodded reassuringly and turned to face Spencer, "what the hell do you want" I replied coldly to Spencer, by now I couldn't stand being so far away from him, the last time I saw him we were cuddled up in my bed and he was snoring softly against my forehead. The tears were threatening to pour again and I knew I had to get out the situation as quickly as possible, I gave Thomas a quick peck on the cheek before rushing off to find the nearest bathroom. I could hear Spencers footsteps approaching me and I knew that with his height he would catch up pretty quick. I was about to get into the bathroom when a hand was suddenly tightening around my shoulder, I spun around and immediately started to sob. I looked at Spencer to see that he was doing the same, sobbing. I had never seen him cry so hard, even after he was kidnapped.

"What do you want?" I said in between sobs, He rubbed his hand comfortingly up and down my shoulder but I moved away after a second. I enjoyed the feeling of being near him again but I couldn't let myself stay any longer, he had hurt me but for some reason I could never get over him. I still found myself pining after him well over a year after he left and the sound of his name would make my heart rate speed up significantly.

"I want to explain" his voice was just as raw as mine and his cheeks were swollen from wiping away the tears. Although he looked completely disheveled I still couldn't stop thinking about how gorgeous he was, I nodded and looked straight into his eyes.

He nodded before he began his explanation "When I was kidnapped he forced me to take certain drugs and after I got out I kept finding myself craving them, eventually I became addicted to those drugs and I couldn't bring myself to tell you so I ran." He looked ashamed with himself, I brought my hand up to his cheek and wiped away a tear. He smiled softly before continuing "I'm clean now and I have been for nearly a year, I feel terrible for hurting you so much. I can tell you've moved on but I just wanted to explain myself to you" He began to walk away but I managed to catch his sleeve before he got too far.

"I'm not over you" I whispered before pulling him closer, our faces were now only centimetres apart. "good" He smiled once again before closing the gap between us, I wrapped my arms around his neck and he did the same but around my waist. I could feel the hot tears still running down both our cheeks although this time those tears were accompanied by a smile and another kiss.

Word Count: 1613 words

Hope this was okay! I've got a plan for the next one but it may take a while to write so it'll be up within the next week!! also thanks to my step sister for giving me the idea ;)

anyways hope you liked it! good morning/afternoon/night - mae xoxo