I will always love you even if I say I don't (Demi Lovato Fan Fiction) (GirlxGirl)

Chapter 102: I Love You Noah

Noah's Pov

 Demi just finished singing In Case and well I am speechless I don’t know what to think or feel but all I know is that even if she moves on she is still going to love me no matter what she is still hoping that I am going to come back one day and that we are going to get back together, I don’t know how to feel anymore honestly I don’t know if maybe I should tell that I am Alex but then I feel like she is falling in love with me Noah and I don’t know I honestly don’t know what to do or say but right now she is looking at me and wondering why I haven’t said anything so I say “wow that’s a really powerful song” she sighs and says “yes it is, I wrote it for Alex and I hope that when I release this album she hears the song and hopefully hears it and makes her understand how much I will still love her even if I move on but I will always have that hope in my heart that she is going to come back one day, it may not be directly to me but I just I wish I had one chance to talk to her again and tell her how sorry and stupid I was for messing up our relationship and how I regret everything that I did, I just I wish that I had some sort of closure with her because right now I know and feel like I am the worst person in the world and it is killing me little by little every day, I just want to hear her voice again one more time I want to know that she is still alive because even though I know that I hurt her I will always love her even if she says that I don’t because I really do, who knows maybe by now she is married and probably has a baby or something but I just I miss her sooo much” up to this point she was crying and my eyes were also stinging and I feel the pain that she is going through in my heart, I don’t know what else to do so I pull her close to me and wraps my arms around her and she cries onto my chest.

 Holding her in my arms makes me feel like the old times when we would cuddle when I would be the big spoon and she would be the little spoon, and we both eventually fall asleep like together like that, it reminds of that love that we once had it makes me feel things that I once felt for Demi it makes me feel like those walls that I built up for her are breaking down, but then a sudden memory comes into my head and I am reminded of the day that I caught her cheating on me with Scarlett and I reminded that it wasn’t only once but a whole month that she cheated on me and I feel this anger and I immediately pull away from her and I get up and I say “I um I’m sorry but I have to go” she gives me this confused but at the same time sad look but I just ignore that and hand her Buddy and say “I’m sorry Demi” and I walk out and grab my jacket and keys and head out to my car, I can’t let her in I can’t fall for her again and let her break my heart I can’t do that whether it’s me Alex or Noah I just can’t because she is going to hurt me in the end again she’s going to break my heart into little pieces and I don’t think that I could take another heart break from Demi again I just can’t.

 Demi’s Pov:

 Why did Noah leave so sudden? It’s like he was consoling me for a moment and then he just changed his mind and decided not to do that, I could feel his heart beating really fast but it was as if he was nervous that I was that close to him but I loved how he held me in his arms because it made me feel like it was Alex but I knew that it wasn’t but then when he pulled away he seemed to be upset with himself like if he was mad that he let himself get carried away from being too close to him, could be that he is also starting to feel something for me just I am falling for him? Or was he upset at himself for hugging me like that knowing that he has a fiancé? Noah confuses me so much sometimes I feel like he lets me in but then other times I feel like he is pushing me away, it’s like if he is having a battle with himself about whether he should let me in his heart or not, and I mean I guess I understand why he tries to now let me in I mean I did hurt his cousin so I guess I understand that he is just trying to keep his guard up.

 After playing a couple of songs I decided to take a shower and then spend the rest of my night catching up on my favorite T.V shows while I cuddle with buddy, I love buddy sooo much and he is really, really adorable, I treat him like if he were my baby boy I mean he actually is my baby boy, I look down at him and snuggled up to me while sleeping and I smile at the site and take a picture of him, pretty soon I fell asleep but then I was woken up when I heard voices downstairs and I knew that it was Isabella and Noah, I hear Noah say “so babe what did you think about the first place we saw?” Isabella says “I loved it I really did but babe don’t you want to have an outdoor wedding?” oh great they are planning their wedding, not something that I really want to hear right now, I hear Noah sigh and he says “yeah I mean but what if it rains?” really Noah you are having your wedding during summer it is not going to rain, Isabella chuckles and says to him “Noah we are having our wedding during the summer what are the odds of it raining?” he sighs and Isabella says “what’s the real reason why you don’t want to have an outdoor wedding?” Noah says “you know why” omg why doesn’t Noah want and outdoor wedding? Did he get left the altar before by one of his ex-girlfriends? I try to pay more attention I even get up to hear what they are saying and Noah says “because having an outdoor wedding was always a picture that I would imagine with someone else” who the hell is that someone else? Like seriously Noah can’t you just say the name?