Dirty Little Secret

Dates and Swoons

Nicolas' POV

   Its been a week since I've been here at Sara and Marks house- my parents house, and I still haven't gotten used to living without Jace and Clary.

    I stretch my body, sighing as my knees and elbows pop before getting out of bed, Benny and I talking to each other as I make my bed and take a shower, coming out to put on some jeans and a tee shirt.

    After taking a breath, I walk downstairs to find Darren and Tessa sitting at the kitchen table, Darren watching some videos on his phone while his sister eats cereal across from him.

    Our sister.

    Sometimes it feels like I got dropped into an alternate reality version of the family I grew up with. Especially since no one knows what to call me.

   My entire life, I've been called Nick. And then I learn that it's the name of a baby that didn't even get to feel the warmth of the sun on his skin. But Robin is the name of the baby boy that this family lost, not who came home to them.

   Right?

   And so I have two names, neither really mine, but both apart of who I am. Neither being used.

   I try to come up with a solution again, hoping doing it randomly will generate more answers, but I come to a wall once again with two options I don't know if I even want.

   Before I can get too lost in my thoughts, Sara walks into the kitchen, and sees me near the stairs, and I walk towards her trying to put a smile on her face, and she returns the gesture, only hers is genuine.

     "Good morning, how did you sleep?" She asks me and a chorus of "good mornings" come from around downstairs from the family.

    "I slept okay." I reply walking past the table my siblings are to get to the island, pulling up a stool as my hands begin to fidget with the button on my pants.

     "It's still hard, isn't it?" I hear and I look up to see Sara- my mom, smiling down at me sadly, I go to deny it, feeling guilty that my unease is so obvious, but she shakes her head. "Don't start apologizing. Anyone in your shoes would be having a hard time right now. You just found out that not only were you kidnapped, your whole life got uprooted and then planted back here without much time in between. It's a lot. We don't expect you to be some magical puzzle piece for our family that we've been searching for for years. We just want you safe, happy and healthy and we hope to make a bond with each other along the way. I just wanted to say that if you need help or someone to talk to, I'm here." She tells me and I frown, tears welling up in my eyes.

    So this is how a mother should be.

    Caring. Loving. Understanding.

    Not controlling, condescending, and selfish.

   My lips form a shaky smile as I nod at my mom. "It might be hard, but I think I'll be okay." I tell her softly, and the smile that she gives me, and the relieved tears in her eyes make my heart full before she laughs lightly and wipes her eyes.

    "Oh boy, sorry, hun, I can be emotional sometimes." She chuckles, and I laugh in surprise, remembering how alone I felt in such a stoic family before. She gives me a smile and a brush of her hand along my cheek before walking back towards the sink. Just as I go to follow her, there's a knock on the door.

   "I wonder who that could be." Sara says, and I flush, everyone knowing exactly who it is at the door. I here a giggle from Tessa and a chuckle from the living room as I pass to open the door.

    When I do, my jaw almost falls to the ground when I find Jace in a button down black shirt, cargo pants and chains around his waist, a bouquet of Lily's in his hand and I gasp in delight at the sight as he smiles and steps towards me.

    "Good morning. I'm here to take you out." He tells me and I giggles in mereces before nodding my head, my face almost split in half from smiling so hard.

   I pull Jace into the house, and he closes the door behind him, his combat boots shined and pretty, and I swoon at all the effort he clearly put into his appearance.

  This is the first time I've seen him face to face outside of school, and the warm feeling of being reunited with him, and back in his grasp soothes the dull ache that lives in my chest when he's not around. "I missed you." I tell him quietly as he leads us the the kitchen where now my whole family is waiting.

    "I missed you more. It's been killing me." He tells me and just for a second I can see the ghost of a pained expression that he tucks back away just as we get to the kitchen. "Good morning."

     "Oh, Jace, it's nice to see you again." She tells him and I watch as she walks towards him for a hug which he barely returns before stepping back. He leans on the counter near him and motions with him head towards the stairs. "Come on runt. Go get ready." He tells me and with a small gasp of excitement, I rush to give him a kiss before running upstairs, stumbling slightly.

     Ignoring my usually annoying clumsy nature, I dress up for our date in a maroon sweater and nice jeans, coming down the stairs to see Jace, Tessa and Darren laughing away at the dining room table.

    My Mate looks up when I come down the stairs, and his eyes soften as he raises from his seat to wrap his warm hand around mine.

   "Perfect." He tells me, and that's exactly what today turns out to be.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Guys it feels so weird to be writing the closing chapters to this book. I mean it's been so long and we all have fell hard for this story. i'll be sad when it's over. We have no more than 10 chapters left, but honestly it'll probably be closer to 5.

Thoughts?

Comments?

QOTD: Do you like carrots?