broken wings

chapter 49 Justin is bae

me and Ryder spent the entire day comfortable in each others arms, he made me happy and made me feel safe, but I guess not even him could put away my demons, not yet at least and since Wednesday keeps on coming closer and closer I honestly want to cry out of scariness. its Saturday, 5 days, not even that, maybe 4. I don't want to go back to him but neither do I want to get hurt by his friends and I mean David proved that they would, Amy and David proved that and it frightened me more than anything did before, not true Dante is more scary.

i want to know how Lilana is, if she even is alive, how is her eye and how are the Tuesdays going? I want to ask her everything and i feel guilty I still haven't done anything to save her, maybe Wednesday? but then again do I dare to go against both their wishes? how do I make subtle hints?

" what are you all thinking about love? " Ryder asked me with a questionable look, he do is smiling and it's adorable.

" I just don't know how to help a certain person " I answered him.

" well love do you have the ability to? If so you should try " he told me with a comforting smile.

" but what if it would risk a lot of things and could bring me and the person in danger? " I asked him now.

" try love, except if it will risk your live, how bad is it? what they need help with " " re-really bad, I feel like I am breaking my promise, I told them I would help them but I am scared and already so much time passed, and I still haven't done anything. the worst part is I wouldn't only help them I would help their entire family. "

" i have the feeling like you are putting a lot of pressure on yourself, you should always try to help people love but not if it brings you down with them. you should always put your own safety first. "

" even if she is in more danger as me ? "

" yes cause I am not living without you " he laughed and started kissing me all over my face

" ry-" " I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love-"

" we get it brother you love her, now get your ass up because I am hungry and I don't know how to cook " me and Ryder both turned to the doorway where his brother was standing smirking at us

" and i do bellamy? you are the adult here, and why are you even here? "

" I wanted to visit my favorite brother and sister-in-law " he laughed after saying that

" well yeah you do are speaking the truth we are the best " Ryder smirked at his older brother who was in his cops uniform still. " not even denying it little brother, girl he wants to marry you. I wouldn't do so he is quite stupid and wo-"

" are you fucking serious you idiot " Ryder said chasing a now running bellamy .

i walked towards the kitchen and decided to start cooking then because to be honest I am hungry too. I looked for all ingredients and decided to make spaghetti in the oven. I always liked it but I mean I just watched my father eat it in the end, I haven't tasted it in ages.

" your boyfriend is craz- oh you are cooking, what we gonna eat darling " bellamy came running in the kitchen.

" just spaghetti in the oven "

" in the oven ? "

" I like it better that way " I told him

" okay then love, its jus us 3, mum wont be back until like later tonight. " I nodded at him, seeing now Ryder run Into the kitchen " you are slow baby brother "

" i am not and never call her love again thats my nickname " Ryder said with a playful smirk on his face

" are you serious ? " bellamy said looking at him like he was the most stupidest person ever.

" yes I am donkey " Ryder said pushing his older brother out of the way to stand behind me, he embraced me from behind and just watched me cook, Bellamy hit him on the back of his head and then sat down on the table and was on his phone, sparing us glances once in a while.

" teenage love " I heard him mummer under his breath, Ryder didn't because he was to busy singing along with the radio which was currently playing baby from Justin Bieber. he also was singing its in my ear, but to be fair I was just laughing with him instead of being all awwww, he was messing up the lyrics quite a bit time to time.

" oh for us I wouldn't have done whatever and I just can't believe we ain't together, I wanne play it cool but I am losing you. I'll buy you any thing and anyring nannaan " he saying while swinging his head side to side.

" maybe learn the lyrics first brother I am pretty sure that this isn't very romantic if you don't even know the words " bellamy laughed while looking at Ryder with a daring look.

oh and Ryder gave one back " oh yeah? like you can do it any better "

" oh I can, Justin is bae "

" you gay? " Ryder laughed at him

" no wrong brother Ryder, also you don't need to be gay to listen to Justin Bieber " bellamy said like it was the most obvious thing ever. which to be honest it was.

Those two kept bickering for the next 40 minutes while I was cooking dinner. at one point they even did a battle on Justin Bieber who knew the lyrics the most.

Bellamy won.

sorry Ryder

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even eating continued like this, I genuinely am confused on how this man is an adult, even a cop adult. he ended up leaving after dinner saying he needed to go finish his paperwork at work.

we said our goodbyes and me and Ryder just continued what we were doing before he decided to come in the house.

we both fell asleep pretty early because we didn't even hear his mother come home, the movie became pretty boring.