MFT 2/ Final Class

An unexpected twist

Next day

Right now I was at school and thinking about yesterday's conversation. Jan or Kendall? I have feelings for both of them, but I can't define them exactly if both of them were love. Why did I agree again to the meeting in the cinema with Jan? Oh, that's right. I stood in front of him as if in a trance and agreed immediately after a short hesitation. I really have to work on thinking a little bit before I agree to something that is not the best idea. "Logan!". I startled briefly and then looked at Jacob with widened eyes. "What's up?", I asked, trying to get my breathing back under control. "You were so lost in thought, I thought I'd bring you back to reality for a change. What's wrong with you?" he asked, a little worried, looking at me. "I think I made a mistake, but I'm not sure if I should undo it," I explained briefly and without much detail. "Why do you think it's a mistake?". "I'm afraid if I do, I'll bitterly regret it afterwards and only cause more problems," I replied. "Don't you want to let everything come to you first and only then decide what you want to do?". "I'd like to, only I don't think it will end well," I mentioned, staring at the worksheets I had in front of me. "That sounds like a difficult situation you're in right now Logan". You said it Jacob but you won't be able to help me with that either.

After my free period was up, I headed to class 4KD to teach math. I had my backpack on my back and my prepared worksheets under my arm as I walked through the school hallways. When I arrived at 4KD, the first thing I did was put my stuff down and say hello to the students. The class looked really awful and this shocked me a bit because I didn't think anyone would care. "For today, I brought a worksheet that is a review from last year. I just want to use it to see what topics we still need to work on this year so that we can quickly get started on the new topics," I explained, meanwhile walking through each row of seats. Afterwards I sat down again on the chair behind the teacher's desk and thought about whether I should now cancel Jan because of Saturday. Without realizing it, I had already composed a message and only had to press send and that would solve this problem. A single button press and then it took care of it but I couldn't press send. I felt that this would be wrong if I didn't go to the meeting and see for myself exactly what Jan wanted from me. After a moment's thought, I deleted the message again and put my phone back in my pocket.

Time jump Saturday

I was excited. Excited about what this movie night would bring me. I hoped for knowledge about my feelings. Just now I was standing in the bathroom, freshly showered, trying to get my hair to look the way I wanted it, but I still had a while to work on that. When I managed with a little gel to make my hair look the way I wanted it, I was satisfied. As for my clothes, I decided to wear regular jeans with a plain black shirt. I decided on a plain style so I wouldn't accidentally want to impress Jan and have him think I was interested in him. It was partly that way but I wanted to suppress those feelings for him as best I could. Now that I was dressed, I just had to wait for Jan to come and pick me up. After a short time I already heard him ringing my doorbell and I opened my apartment door for him with a soft smile. "Hey Logan. Ready for the movies?" he asked cheerfully with a grin on his face. "Sure. Let's go," I replied, and we both left the apartment block and started walking to the movie theater. "How are you?" asked Jan, smiling at me. "Quite well and you?", I asked him. "Quite well, too. All week long I was just looking forward to this day and now we can finally go to the movies together," he explained and laughed briefly. "Other question, do we want to go to your place after the movie?" he asked excitedly, looking at me. "Let's see," was my answer and after a short time we had already arrived at the cinema. Jan and I paid for our tickets as well as our popcorn and drink.

We sat down in one of the back seats to get a good view of the movie screen. Jan dropped into the seat next to me and looked at me with a warm smile. I smiled at him as well and then noticed that it was already getting dark in the movie theater and the commercials were starting to play on the screen. With little interest, I looked at the movie screen and instead grabbed my phone, which I had set to a low brightness so it wouldn't be too bright. When I unlocked it, I saw that Kendall had texted me and asked if he could come over tonight. I replied in the negative, hoping not to disappoint him. After a short wait came a quick ok and then he was immediately offline again. "Who are you texting with?", Jan asked me when he noticed I was still in WhatsApp just now. "Oh just my sister," I lied and put my phone back in my pocket after that because the movie was already starting. It seemed to be an action movie, if I had to judge by the title and the atmosphere. I didn't know the movie yet and I decided to give it my attention to catch everything and understand the plot. When we reached the middle of the movie, I felt Jan put his hand on my thigh and looked at me briefly with a grin. I looked at his hand and decided to just ignore it.

After a short while I felt Jan take my hand and put it on his thigh as well and licked his lips. I got a really bad feeling about this. I had to get out of here. I suddenly felt uncomfortable around Jan and think that he doesn't want to have a real relationship. So I took my hand off his thigh and stood up after it. "Where are you going Logan?" he asked surprised looking at me. "I have to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back," I lied and then left the movie theater. Of course, this was just a cheap excuse to get out of this situation with him. When I walked a few aisles in this cinema, I then left it and walked down the street back to my apartment. This didn't go well for long, as I was suddenly pulled into a small alley and I now saw Jan in front of me again. "Why did you want to run away from me?" he asked sourly, looking at me with an angry look. "Jan, for me this situation was uncomfortable and it just felt wrong. I had to leave," I tried to make him understand, but he wouldn't let go of me. "Didn't the kiss mean anything to you?" he asked, stunned, looking at me. "No," I answered firmly. "It just confused me more," I admitted, trying to break free from his grip. "I can change your mind in a hurry," he said, and I had a bad feeling about the whole thing. He then pushed me against the cold concrete wall and unzipped my jeans. Jan let one of his hands slide into my boxers and started stroking me. "That feels good, doesn't it?" he asked, biting his lip. I just looked at him emotionlessly and hoped that he would give up quickly.

"Admit it. You do think I'm sexy," he said, grinning at me. "Jan, I have no feelings for you. Get that through your head!", I shouted and tugged his hand out of my boxers. "What the hell is wrong with you Logan!". "What's wrong with me you ask? What's wrong with you Jan! When we first met, you acted very differently towards me than you have now. I thought you were a nice, attentive and sweet guy, but I was very wrong. I should never have got involved in this meeting with you, because I had the feeling that you were only interested in sex. Don't you dare step under my eyes again. I am happy with my current situation and I want to stay that way. Find happiness with someone else and leave me alone for once!" I shouted, tearing myself away from him and walking down the street to my apartment block.