Serpentine ; Fred Weasley

Eighty-three

I got dressed again before using the bathroom after Fred, and when I joined him and George in the kitchen, George was making a sandwich while trying not to laugh.

"What?" Fred asked him as he sat down by the table but George shook his head and snickered, then bit back a laugh. "George, it was a joke!"

"What's going on?" I asked as I walked over to make myself a cup of tea.

"I made a joke and now this idiot's judging me."

"Because you called it a snack!" George spoke and turned to look at his brother. "That's not... that's disgusting, mate."

Fred shrugged.

"It was a tasty snack though."

"What are you two talking about?" I asked and poured some of the water from the kettle into my cup.

"Nothing." George hurried to say.

"No, we were talking about something." Fred told me. "We forgot to silence the room."

I quickly turned and looked at Fred.

Silencing the room had completely slipped my mind.

"And you are very loud." Fred added, my eyes widening. "So I was explaining to George that I was having my morning snack."

I raised my eyebrows as Fred smirked in satisfaction, licking his lips then humming.

"Oh, you are disgusting." George made a face and Fred broke into laughter while throwing his head back.

"Seriously Fred?" I asked. "You talk to George about our sex life?"

"He does it all the time." George breathed. "It's never a conversation I'd want to have. I'd also like to step out of this conversation and eat my breakfast in my room."

He disappeared into his room while I walked over to the table and placed my cup of tea down.

Before I got to pull a chair out, Fred grabbed onto me and pulled me into his lap.

He cupped one side of my face and I wrapped my arm around his neck. He pressed a kiss to my lips, then smiled.

"You look really beautiful today." He whispered, resting his chin on my shoulder.

"No I don't. I look like shit."

I felt him smile against me.

"You're a beautiful piece of shit then." He said before he leaned his head back so he could watch me. "You haven't changed your mind about Christmas? Your family—"

"I don't want to spend it with my family, Freddie." I cut him off, and he nodded slightly, his eyes scanning over my face again and again.

"I don't want you to change your mind because you're hurting right now." He said, running his hand up and down my thigh.

"I'm not hurting." I shrugged. "Why would I be hurting?"

Fred raised his eyebrows at me.

"Kwan died..."

"Well no shit." I scoffed. "But it doesn't hurt. It makes me fucking pissed, but that's it."

That was honestly a complete lie. I was really hurting, knowing I'd never see my oldest brother anymore.

I sighed.

"That's not true. I mean, I am angry but I'm also sad." I mumbled, moving my fingers over the material on his shoulder. "I just want him back. I want to sit on the sofa in his flat and talk to him. I want to catch him up on my life like I did so many times, and I want to hug him and help him plan his wedding."

When I looked at Fred, his eyes were already glued to me, his hand resting on my knee while his other arm rested around my back.

"I miss him." I whispered, my bottom lip quivering as I teared up.

"I know you do, lovely."

I sighed, resting my head against his shoulder to hide the fact that I wanted to cry.

I ran my hand up the nape of his neck, brushing my nose into his neck while his hand brushed up and down my thigh in a soothing manner.

"We can go see his grave before we leave for the Burrow." He suggested. "Maybe bring some flowers?"

***

My heels echoed through the area as Fred and I walked hand in hand towards the cemetery where Kwan was buried.

When we reached the gate, Fred held it open and I let my hand slips from his to walk inside.

I folded my arms over my chest, my eyebrows furrowed as I walked across the cemetery to find the grave.

Fred was behind me but he sort of keeping his distance, letting me do this on my own because he knew I needed to.

When I stood in front of the grave, I simply stared the picture of him that was put into the stone, his name written underneath it along with his birthday and death date.

"You think he did it, don't you?" I asked. "Apparently he wrote a will."

I heard Fred sigh.

"I don't know, Kai."

"It shouldn't have happened." I said. "And if he really did do it, then fuck him."

I kept staring at the picture of Kwan who was smiling widely, and I felt a few hot tears run down my cheeks.

I pulled my wand from my pocket, pointing it at the grave with the intention of a bouquet of flowers to appear, and they did.

"First he ran away from our family." I laughed. "And after we entered his life again, he fucking killed himself."

"You can't believe that. Kwan didn't commit suicide because of you and your siblings."

I looked at Fred.

"How can you say that? You don't know that, Fred. I always tried to push him to have a relationship with mum... and Carter was fighting with him just hours before it happened! What if we did this?"

Fred just shook his head. He looked at me like he hated what I was saying, but I couldn't get it out of my head.

What if I made Kwan do this?

What if he actually did commit and I had just been in denial about it?

"Can we go?" I asked and looked at Fred who nodded.

"We should probably wait to get married until—"

"No." I spoke. "I don't want to wait."

We had planned to go down to the ministry and get married today before going to the Burrow, but then we decided to visit the cemetery.

"Are you sure?" Fred asked and reached out to brush something away from my cheek. "We can do it between Christmas and New Years."

"No." I sighed and tugged on his hand. "I want to marry you, Freddie. I don't want to wait any longer."