Ecstasy

Life's Not Fair

"I eat my dinner in the bathtub

Then I go to sex clubs

Watching freaky people getting it on" 

- Excerpt from Habits (Stay High) by Tove Lo

TWO YEARS LATER... 

BRIELLE WILLIAMS

I put the weed stick against my mouth and inhale the high-inducing scent.

No matter how unhealthy this is, I will never stop.

I exhale the smoke and watch in satisfaction as the smoke travels out my mouth and dissipates into the room.

An arm wraps around my waist and I look down to see Casey, my boyfriend, who has his head on my lap.

Casey and I met around six months ago and began dating around two. He begged me to be his girlfriend and gave me around 100 dollars. Personally, I didn't mind. Casey is a drug dealer and he has a lot of weed on him. So, if I'm his girlfriend... you see where I'm going?

"Baby," he says and I roll my eyes.

"What?" I ask, trying not to show my irritation.

"You should let me bone you," he says, giving my waist a small kiss. I push him off and get off the bed.

"I have work soon. Hickies don't look nice on me, especially where I'm working, Casey, you know that," I say and rewrap the thin robe I had on to make myself warm. It's unnaturally cold in my run-down apartment.

I hear ringing and I go to the nightstand and grab the phone. Casey is looking at me hard, trying to change my mind through some sort of mind-link.

I glare at him to stop and answer it.

"Hey girl. You need a ride to work tonight?" asks Hannah, my best friend.

Hannah and I met through work, kind of.

When I was struggling, I still am, and practically homeless, she took me in and helped me get back on my feet. I'm so happy for how she helped me out that sometimes I help her out by giving around one-third of my money at the end of my shift.

Unlike me, she has two mouths to feed.

"Uh," I glance over at Casey, "Terry said he'll pick me up tonight so I'll be alright," I say and hang up.

I'm not having sex with Casey so he most likely will be storming out like the dick he is so being dependent on him to give me a ride to work isn't ideal. Terry is our bouncer and it's obvious he likes me so he'll pretty much do anything for me.

Casey gets up and gives me a kiss on the forehead and then goes down to my lips. However, I didn't kiss him back.

When he realizes this, he gets off of me.

"You know, Brielle, sometimes you act like a fucking bitch," he tells me. I shrug.

"If I don't want sex, I don't want sex. Is it so hard to get that in your fucking head?" I tell him and he goes to argue and then stops.

"Fuck you, Brielle," he says and begins gathering his drugs. I don't want him to take it but I don't even care at this point.

"Something you wish you could do," I sneer and he flips me off, leaving my apartment while slamming the door hard behind him.

Despite my best efforts, I can't find a cigarette in my apartment. Casey has managed to take all of them.

I should've stolen some.