Ecstasy

Hell's Castle

"If only a horrible storm can demolish the castle of the devil, then let the storm be victorious! It is not uncommon that heaven comes after hell." 

- Excerpt from Mehmet Murat ildan

BRIELLE WILLIAMS

After Lorenzo's visit, I can't stand seeing Sergei. When I see him, it brings such an awful taste in my mouth and it's just... he's a vile man.

I hate him so much.

I just want to go home. I'm most likely fired from my job which I probably would've quit anyway since Sergei owns the place and I would see him eventually.

I miss Hannah. I miss Chloe. I only watch T.V. but not too much because I'm not allowed to. I have no access to a phone and even if I do. It's only for something small and very important.

I'm happy Sergei, for some reason, has a library because it's the only place where I can actually do something. I'm just reading every day and if not I'm outside in the garden, watering flowers.

I notice each day I'm here it's getting harder and harder to sleep. Especially after the 'acts' me and Sergei do with one another.

As if I want to do them.

For the past few days, I've asked the maids not to clean the guest bedroom. When they question me all I say is "Sergei says so" and they don't say anything.

Why?

So I can curl up in the blanket and the pillow and still smell Lorenzo's heavy cologne in the room. I fall asleep rather quickly in the room. I wait until Sergei falls asleep and then go into the room and sleep.

To make sure I'm not caught, Scott would wake me up so I can go back to the room and he suspects nothing. I clean up after so he doesn't think the maids aren't doing their jobs.

I sleep much better not next to a monster.

I want to be in Lorenzo's arms. The hugs he gave me when Sergei wasn't there.

I miss him so much.

"Wake up," Sergei grumbles and I rub my eyes open, pretending that I just woke up when I actually didn't. I've been awake for about 30 minutes watching the seconds tick by until he 'wakes' me up.

I sit up and go into the bathroom where Sergei is opening up a pregnancy test.

A typical morning.

It seems like he really doesn't understand how pregnancy works. I literally can't get pregnant the day after I have sex.

I go and pee on the stick, with no privacy whatsoever, and while we brush our teeth and get ready, for me another horrible day in this house, we wait for the results.

I put on a white turtleneck and black jeans and walk to the sink since it's time for the thing to be over now and show us the...

My heart drops when I read the test.

Two lines...

Positive?

I'm pregnant?

With... his child...

I press my lips together, trying to keep myself together. My vision gets a bit blurry but I furiously blink tears away.

I can't be pregnant.

There is no absolute way.

I'm taking birth control. I know that birth control isn't 100% effective but...