Natasha Romanoff One Shots

The Other Widow pt. 2

**AN: this one is about to be quite long because I couldn't figure out where I wanted to split it to make a part three. So enjoy this particularly long part 2 to the other widow one shot**

The snow is falling and that means Christmas time has finally come around again. Your past 11 months in the compound have been great, but you couldn't shake the nagging anxious feeling you had in the pit of your stomach.

You didn't want to be left alone again. Especially since Nat and Yelena had promised they weren't going anywhere and have since done everything in their power to prove it to you. And to be honest it was nice to have two sisters instead of one.

You were pleasantly surprised to have been included in all of this years Christmas activities. From ice skating to picking and decorating the tree, you were experiencing your first real Christmas with the people who have became your family. Yelena had left after getting the tree as she had a quick mission but would be back by Christmas Eve, so Nat took it upon herself to make sure you still got to do everything else on your list including decorating cookies and watching elf.

But the team was once again scheduled to go to Clint's farm, and no one had said anything to you. You had spent the last few nights panicking that they would leave you... again.

But they wouldn't right?

After what happened last year you thought you could be sure... but now, now you're panicking. Especially with Yelena gone.

You thought no one had known about your panic attacks, but Wanda being the mind reader she is could feel your panic and in turn told Nat who told Yelena over text. Both thought that you would have come talked to them though.

That wasn't until Nat found you mid panic attack in the hallway.

"маленький паук (little spider)" she said. But you couldn't hear her.

She pulled you into her lap and held you to try and give you something to anchor yourself to. Which to her surprise worked. You weren't a physical touch person, at least not with her. So she thought it was a trust thing... when you allowed her to hold you, god she could have cried from happiness right then and there. She continued to hold you while humming a Russian lullaby to pull you back.

When your breathing finally evened out some Nat turned you to talk to you.

You waited for her to talk. It was as if she was scared. And truthfully she was, she didn't want to push you too far as to push you away. She loved you as much as Yelena did, and she'd be dammed if she didn't try to fix anything that was bothering you.

"You don't have to tell me if you're not comfortable, but would you be willing to tell me why you've been having panic attacks for the last few nights?" She asked.

You pulled away and looked at her confused on how she knew until she told you Wanda told her.

You sat there contemplating what to tell her before snuggling back into her and saying "you might get mad."

The whisper and tremble in your voice scared Nat, but she couldn't let you know that. "I don't get mad easily, and I could never be mad at you маленький паук (little spider)" she had to make she kept her own emotions in check to be there for you. Because while you weren't always vulnerable with Nat, she would cherish the times you would open up to her. This being one of them.

You closed your eyes and took a deep breath before baring your soul to her.

"I know you guys are going to Clint's tomorrow again for Christmas and I know I wasn't invited again and I was just scared to be left alone again that you weren't going to come back this time."