Mr Player//BTS FF

Chapter 70

After you had come to your senses a little you had run to find Seon but you had not found her anywhere on the road so you had called Ari and Dae informing them of the mess and that you needed help.

The two girls had said that they would stop by Seon's house to look for her and of course if they found her they would notify you. After that phone call was over you called Yoongi, giving a full report on the state Jungkook was in and asking them to go by his apartment. Of course, he told you that he and Taehyung would deal with things from now on, obviously referring to the pills.

You had stayed in the car after in silence, your breathing still ragged until your phone rang, your supervisor Shin reminding you that you had basically stolen his car and had to take it back and that's when you remembered about Jimin too as you had left him there so you quickly set out to return to the company.

It had been about an hour since you left the company when you made it back and headed to your office, Shin immediately revealed himself in front of you with a mouth full of complaints, which you completely ignored and simply handed him his car keys back and left.

You stepped into the elevator and felt your body lose all energy once alone in it, the touch of Jungkook's hand around your neck still fresh in your memory. But you had to pull yourself together because you had a sick and heartbroken Jimin now to deal with.

The elevator opened and you stepped out heading towards Jungkook's office where you had left him but Jungkook's secretary stopped you in your tracks, informing you that no one was inside.  

"What do you mean? Where did Jimin go?" You asked her and the secretary informed you that he had been gone for some time now.

Upon hearing this information you had decided to call him but as he was not answering your calls you became worried and decided to go home to check if he was there. Where else could he have gone in his condition after all?

It took you thirty-five minutes to get to the entrance of your apartment building in the taxi that luckily for you, you had found as soon as you stepped outside the company building and then you hurried inside and eagerly watched the numbers on the elevator go up.

When you were finally on your floor, you ran to the end of the hallway where the door to Jimin's apartment was and knocked on the door but even though you were waiting no one seemed to come to open it.

Worried even more than before you took out your bag and started looking for your key which you still had and luckily you were carrying them with you today and you hadn't forgotten them in your other bag which was still at Jungkook's house along with some other belongings of yours.

You opened the door and walked in, calling his name and searching the rooms for him,  only to come face to face with an empty closet that he had left open.

You were left speechless for a moment, realizing that Jimin had packed up and left just like that. Your legs felt like they wouldn't hold you for a moment so you sat on the edge of the bed and just ran your hands over your face, feeling yourself suffocating from the stress.

Your cell phone suddenly went off, making you jump on your feet and immediately pull it out of your pocket, a wave of relief washing over your face as soon as you saw that it was Jimin calling you.

"Come on! Where are you? Where are you going in a condition like this, you know I was worried and—" He interrupted your words only by calling your name and asking you to listen to him for a moment.

"I need time to myself, to weigh my mistakes, my feelings and try to heal my wounds. That's why I will be staying in Tokyo for a while, I'm flying out in five minutes." His words froze your emotions and you simply sat on the edge of the bed again telling him that you understand even though that wasn't what you wanted to tell him.

You had your own problems and your own mess inside you and he had told you that he would be there for you but now you were feeling like he was abandoning you. And yes, you certainly understood well the reason and how he might be feeling but why no one seemed to think about how you could be feeling.

Everyone was immersed in their own pain and you had tried to distract your mind from your own worries by attending to the problems of others and helping them. But this help that you gave either to Seon or to Jimin or to Jungkook was never perfectly clean. Because the thought of fear was always there. The fear of being alone, of being hated and considered evil was what made you behave a little more calmly and rationally. The fear of losing people you cared about like Seon that was your friend, who even though she had hurt you and you wanted to hurt her back in retaliation, she still was all you had.

You just didn't want to end up hated and alone, you didn't want Luke's words to end up being true. That you were like him.

"You can stay at home as long as you want, don't worry about it, you have money on the nightstand." His voice continued to be heard in your ear but now you just closed your lips, not wanting him to hear you crying, feeling like a pest but also the worst person in the world.

You were living off his money and that was one of the reasons you had calmed down your anger towards him at the time and you had confessed it to him the day you had had a conversation, the day you understood both his and Seon's side and that day you had realized that you were pretty grey yourself in the case. Because the reasons for your anger and your actions were selfish, it was all about your own pain and betrayal. Everything revolved around you and now you knew it wasn't entirely right but you also knew you were capable of such feelings and that was the first hit that was torturing you and making that devilish whisper that Luke might be right, after all, to echo inside you. 

Maybe you were the same as Luke after all. Maybe your egoism and his were the same.

Those thoughts had consumed you in silence and every day, unfortunately, hurting you and imprisoning you, but your turn to speak out about everything that was going on in your head never seemed to come along, with these and that, something else was always going on. 

"One more thing." Jimin's voice suddenly cracked as he spoke making your eyes grow wide at the realization that you weren't the only one crying at that moment, for he too was shoving his tears while trying to not be noticed by any passersby.

"Don't tell anyone where I will be...And...Please, please take care of yourself... I trust you." Those were the last words that reached your ears before he hung up and you just stood there staring at the now empty closet in front of you before you allowed yourself to continue crying freely.

Now you were on your own... Now everyone was on their own.

---To be continued...