Mr Player//BTS FF

Chapter 81

You slowly opened your eyes, your field of vision blurry for a moment as you took a few minutes to come into contact with your surroundings. You looked around only to find that you were in Jungkook's office and more specifically laying on his couch, a jacket covering your upper body to keep you warm.

You rose to a sitting position and looked around to see that you were alone in the room and then simply wondered what were you doing there. It didn't take long for your memory to wake up and bring the shocking moment before your eyes. Luke enters this office. So close to you, two steps away. Your nightmare had looked you in the eye before everything had come to a screeching halt and total darkness in your memory.

What the hell...I passed out?

You wondered before letting your head lean back on the couch, now feeling numb. Luke's face hadn't left your mind yet for some reason you couldn't feel anything. It was as if your emotional safety had been blown at that moment. Like you had unconsciously turned off everything inside in an attempt to protect yourself. It was like you were dead inside. Your mind was empty of any thoughts that you should have had, like what to do. Where to run? Where to find the money? How to get rid of him?

All you wanted was to just get him out of your life, out of your memory forever. Oh, if only you could have been more courageous and not have trembled while facing him. Only if your heart didn't shiver with fear in his presence. But you knew that you were much weaker than you let it show,  especially when it comes to him.

Your eyes fell on the clock against the wall and as soon as you saw the time - informing you that it was four in the afternoon,- You jumped to your feet and ran out of the office to get back to work. You had to finish reading at least a hundred letters today and you were also going to drop by to see Seon after work and go home to Jimin. Your plans were clearly not going as you had thought of them, however.

Jungkook's secretary called your name as you ran past her desk, asking you if you were okay and you replied that you were fine, even though you knew you would most likely not be fine for long for you probably would get scolded by Jungkook about the trouble you had caused. Certainly having someone pass out in your office while an important representative came in was not the best first impression to make on someone.

As you took the elevator down, you made a stop at the office floor, and as you were about to exit it, you happened to come face to face with your supervisor Shin right by the elevator's door. He was surprised for a moment to see you but then he smiled, obviously relieved that you were fine.

"Come on, let's go to the set together. The boss needs to see you. He said to let him know when you wake up." He told you as he stepped onto the elevator and kept you in, pressing the button of the floor where the photography set was taking place and you just swallowed your saliva with difficulty and said nothing, thinking that you would probably hear the scolding your life again. But that was not your main concern. For you just wished for Luke to not be still somewhere around the company and that thought was lingering like a ghost at the back of your mind.  

You followed Shin silently, hiding a bit behind his body for reassurance. For some reason, your senses had become very jittery, and out of the corner of your eyes, you kept looking around, having a pure concern for your surroundings. Just the thought that he might be anywhere near made you uneasy.

"Y/N!" You panicked when you heard your name being called and reacted sharply, taking steps back as a precaution. And Your behaviour was clearly noticed by Jungkook who had been the one that called your name.

 He approached you anyway, his gaze full of anxiety and worry for you and your health, as when you had fainted earlier he had been very frightened, but the doctor whom he himself called to see you immediately after, -while he had stayed with you without leaving your side not even for a  moment-  had reassured him that nothing serious was going on with your health.

Jungkook because of this had been forced to leave a new appointment with the representative of the company from London, with which the company was planning a possible collaboration. Such an act marked a first for him as a professional for he had never cancelled a meeting or postponed it for any reason.

"How are you feeling? Are you better?" He asked you and you awkwardly hugged yourself before looking around once more and then proceeding to nod your head to give him a positive answer.

"I'm sorry. Please don't fire me. I won't cause you any trouble again I promise." Jungkook was taken aback by your behaviour and after looking around and taking notice of a few unwanted stares, he grabbed you by the forearm and led you towards the dressing rooms so that you can talk more comfortably and in private.

"What do you take me for anyway? If you were sick, you should have told me. I want you to be consistent in your work, yes, but not at the expense of straining your body and collapsing here and there." He answered you, somewhat offended although his anger was due to the fact that You were playing with your health. For some reason, it bothered him a lot that you weren't taking good care of yourself, but what bothered him more was the feeling inside him that was screaming at him to take care of you with his own two hands.

"My health doesn't matter. I just have a lot on my mind, that's all. Don't worry, it won't happen again, I won't let my personal problems affect my performance at work."

"What was that now? Are you trying to imply that I let my emotions affect my work?" Jungkook raised an eyebrow, taking your words as an indirect hit at him and his bad behaviour today.

"That wasn't what I was trying to say but since you got triggered by it, maybe there's something there you could reflect upon" You retorted as you faced him, without any facial expression yet the way you spoke left a hint of frustration to be understood.

Jungkook took a deep breath as he didn't want to start any fights with you again and simply let his body lean on the side of the wall, the two of you staying in silence for a few minutes in that short hallway.

"Anyway. If you want a few days off—"

"No thanks." You interrupted his sentence before Jungkook could even finish, making him give you an annoyed look.

"You have no intention of cooperating, do you? Why do you want to get on my nerves anyway? You think I like being mean to my friends?"

"What friends Jungkook. We're not friends." You told him plainly, looking into his eyes.

" You may have not have realized it but I dislike you. I dislike this behaviour of yours, I dislike the moments when you lose your control, the moments you break everything in front of you and expect an apology to fix everything. I dislike all the stupid things you've done and how selfish you can be. I hate you for everything you've done to my friend and it pisses me off that you think you could still have hopes with her when you know fully well, you don't deserve her!" You blurred out some of your many thoughts, now showing clearly your irritation towards him and his actions.

Jungkook's gaze had now turned hostile towards you and he didn't hesitate to respond to your clear attack on him. "Seriously. Someone like you has the audacity to judge my own actions? Someone who knew the reason for her friend's suicide but still didn't speak up. An awful man is free to enjoy his life and may have hurt many more people. All because you were weak. All because you made the mistake of not speaking. You, judge me for mistakes? At least what I did was out of love, your actions were out of fear. To protect yourself!" Jungkook's words were like a sword that cut right through you with every word that left his lips, bringing tears to your eyes, which made Jungkook regret everything he had just uttered under this moment that he was swept by anger.

Your pained expression seemed to tighten something inside him and make his heart ache and for some reason, that feeling irritated him slightly more.

"I knew. I shouldn't have told you. My mistake." That was all you uttered back at him before turning and walking away, leaving a very irritated Jungkook who had once again messed things up with someone he wanted so much to be okay with.

---To be continued...