Joker and Harley oneshots and headcanons.

Headcanons.

- When Harley has nightmares, J wraps her up in his arms and promises he'll be there when she wakes up. He always fulfils that promise. He doesn't care how many meetings he misses, how much money he loses, he always stays there until she's up.

- In the colder months, J often ends up giving Harley his coat. She has no concept of dressing for the weather and he isn't going to let her freeze half to death, even if she complains that a coat will ruin her outfit. She has plenty of stylish coats, but "It just won't work with this outfit, Puddin!"

- J always knows when Harley is mad at him, it's a very specific stare he doesn't get any other time. On one hand, it's hot, on the other, it's slightly terrifying and bone chilling.

- J smokes in everyone's face but Harley's. He knows the adverse affects, and even though he continues to do it, he isn't pulling Harley down with him. In 20 years, he'll be reaping the benefits, not her.

- Harley loves wearing her hair up because it shows off all of the marks J leaves on her neck. She doesn't cover them up, but shows off all her hickeys and bites. And it works J up, reminding him of what they did together to cause those marks.

- Outside of tattoos and piercings, Harley has a severe needle phobia, and she feels bad sometimes because J always stitches up her wounds from fights, making it as comfortable as he can for her, but she can't do the same for him. It's usually Frost who gives J stitches when needed, Harley can't even be in the same room. J tells her that she returns the favour by helping him with other injuries and helping him take care of his stitches after they're done. He'd rather her wait in another room watching TV and texting him occasionally than make herself sit next to him, battling the urge to run away and throw up.

- J has gone into online meetings too many times with lipstick marks all over him. Also in person meetings. Harley just can't help herself sometimes.

- J is the main cook out of the two of them, Harley can cook, but only basic things, anything more than that and she's out of her field, even as Harleen she only cooked simple things, like pasta. Any food that requires more skill and work is usually made by J. She helps sometimes, but J will tell her to go sit down and relax.

- J is very good at multitasking while driving because of Harley. Before he's rubbed her sore legs, been on a call with Frost, and drove them back home.

- Harley often asks J to recreate scenarios from the books she reads with her. She loves smutty mafia books, even though J nitpicks all of the inaccuracies. He has to pry her phone out of her hands sometimes so she'll go to sleep.

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Harley is a dark romance smut girly and I will stand by that headcanon.

- lilmisspuddinpop