I have a crush on Jeno. That's not a mystery to anybody, even to Jeno himself. I was always head over heels for him. Of course, he was totally hot and handsome, but he never turned his eyes at me. And even though I wish I could get over him, I always find myself again in this stupid position of being all shy in front of him, in a way that I can't think straight and talk properly, and that annoys me sometimes.
Today our friends decided to do a gathering where he would be there. I hate to admit that my heart jumped when I knew he would come too, but it can't be helped anymore. And there he was. Completely breathtaking in a black shirt, always followed by his best friend Jaemin.
I had talked to Jaemin before, but not for too long. He was a nice guy who could be friends with anyone, apparently. He and Jeno are inseparable, which I always found cute.
After some hours, I decide to take a rest. I tried to talk to Jeno more, but the reality is that he is not interested in me, in all the meanings, and it frustrates me a lot. Sighing heavily, I pass by the hall, going towards the kitchen to grab something to drink to relieve my stress. I was so focused on my own world that I didn't notice someone passing by the same place as me. I bumped on someone, and before I could realize, I looked up and Jaemin's face was just some inches far from mine. I widened my eyes while my heart accelerated.
-Oh, my gosh. I'm sorry. – I say, moving away quickly from him while he just stares at me. Suddenly, he bursts out laughing, making me confused.
-Why is your face so red? – He asks, and I frown touching my face. Is it not obvious why it's red? Why is he even asking that? – It's not like we would kiss here. You are the girl who is all crazy about Jeno, right? You wouldn't do anything with me. – He says with a mocking smirk on his lips, taking me by surprise.
So, that's how it is. This is what they all think about me. A total fool. I clench my jaw, turning around and leaving him behind with that teasing smirk. If even Jaemin said something like this, surely Jeno knows everything already. I feel my throat closing in pain and anger. I'm so idiot. And especially what Jaemin said made me so angry that I wanted to cry right there.
I suddenly stop in the middle of the hall. Am I going to let him talk to me like that? I'm tired. I'm tired of everybody looking at me with pity or mocking eyes. I don't know what came over me at that time, but I simply turned around again and went back to the kitchen. Jaemin was still there in the same place. I walked to him, and his eyes spotted me. Before he could say anything more or throw any other joke at me, I hold his face with my hands and crash my lips on his.
Yeah, I was totally crazy, but I just couldn't let him have the taste of messing with me like I was stupid. He flinches in surprise as I give him a long peck. His eyes widen when I pull away, and he gets speechless.
-Am I still the girl crazy over Jeno who wouldn't do anything? I'm not silly as you and Jeno think I am. – I say, looking directly at his eyes, and go away right after.
I didn't think twice at that time. I just wanted to prove him wrong, but now, in the day after, I finally realized what I had done. I kissed Jeno's best friend.
Taking a deep breath, I try to talk to my friends as if nothing had happened, and suddenly, I see them getting to the university. I don't know exactly why my heart is racing now. If it's because of Jeno or because I have to look at Jaemin's face after what I did.
Apparently, it wasn't that big deal for him. Some classes went by and Jaemin didn't even glance at me. It made me relieved, and at the same time intrigued. If even after kissing one of them didn't make them talk to me, Jeno wouldn't ever like me anyway.
I thought that would be it. Maybe Jaemin was in shame for what I did to him, and he wouldn't bring it up again, but turned out I was wrong.
-Hi! – I flinch in the table, looking above my shoulder just to see Jaemin there, as usual with that smirk. He pulls out a chair, sitting beside me at the library. – Why are you blushing? – He says, pinching my cheek. – Are you going to kiss me again? Jeno is gonna think you like me. – He says, and I widen my eyes, looking around.
