Finding Her Joy

Light

"Everything the light touches..."

It's funny how a movie made for a little kid can end up having so much impact on an adult.

There's always the underlying theme that the kids don't understand. They get the basic ones like: take care of yourself instead of just other people, friends are everywhere, falling in love.

Then there's the deeper meaning hidden underneath.

That doesn't mean you should keep to yourself and forget those around you. What I mean is that taking care of yourself isn't just eating the right things or getting some sun. No. It means to give yourself the chance for the best life you can have. Live for yourself. Don't live for others.

This life is yours, and you shouldn't waste it letting other people take your happiness. You deserve just as much as them.

Do what you love. Do what makes you happy. Slow down, you don't have to go so fast all the time. Go out and smell the roses. It's okay to take a break. Surround yourself with the things and people you love. Just be in the moment.

Friends are everywhere. There are so many people out there who would be lucky to have you in their life. People you wouldn't think you'd ever meet are the ones that aways show up just as you need them.

The ones you work with. The random lady at the store who does her shopping the same time as you. One person you meet through an app and connect with. Mutual love or hatred for anything can lead you to your people.

What about love?

They aren't just falling in love during the movie. They are allowing themselves to be open and honest. They are proving that no matter how hard things get, there will always be someone there who will care for you. They don't shy away from the idea that, yes, love can be beautiful and amazing, but it can also be one of the scariest things to happen to a person.

There's a certain vulnerability that comes with letting someone in can be the most terrifying thing you could ever experience. To let them know you, all of you. Every thought that runs through your mind. Every fear you have. They learn about your wants, needs, and desires.

Anyone can learn or share these things with a person, and most have no problem with it. Others find that their whole world could collapse if they share the wrong thing too soon, or if they let all of their words fall out of them and the person doesn't stay.

But you stayed.

I told you everything. All the dark parts about myself. Everything I hate about my past, my mind, and my body. I filled you in on all the horrible things I've done or been witness to. And do you remember what you said...

"I don't see you for who you were or the bad things that surround you. I see you as who you are. You, Darling, are smart, funny, and beautiful. You are perfect, and the dark bits don't matter to me. I love you to the edges of the universe."

I remember laughing to myself, wondering, "How can you love me to the edge if the universe is constantly expanding?" I was thinking too logically about it, instead of just enjoying the sweet sentiment... instead of just enjoying my life with you.

There is no way that I could leave this world without getting the most out of my relationship with you. I want to grow old with you. I need to experience however much life I have left with you. With you next to me. With your happy smile. With your kind eyes looking deep into mine when you tell me you love me.

I want it.

I need it.

We're going to get it.

I've waited this long to have you, and I don't want to wait anymore. I'm going to get my joy. I've earned it. I've earned your affections. I've got to know what forever will be like with you.

I don't want everything the light touches. I just want you. My sweet little sunshine girl.

Just let me wake up.

Wake up.

"Oh my God! Amelia!"

"... Hello, Sweetheart."

"Yes, keep your eyes on me. Autumn's going to fix you. I promise."

My eyes will never leave you again. I swear it.

*A/N- Whoa! She's awake? Damn. I wonder who died then... guess we'll find out tomorrow.