Let me Touch your Tail

Chapter 112

The little fox was stunned. However, after saying all this, Yan Zhao felt a burden lift from her heart. She had respected her own feelings and also given the little fox the freedom to choose. If her mother knew about this, would she praise her for being smart?

Yan Zhao returned to her small courtyard, took off her shoes and socks, and went to sleep. Once the candles were extinguished, she quickly drifted off. The little fox, nestled in her arms, lifted its head, staring at Yan Zhao's peaceful face in the dark.

"I don't want you to leave me, but I'm willing to give you the freedom to choose."

Yan Zhao's words were always straightforward. She said what she felt and never spoke in circles like others might. What she said came from the most genuine part of her heart.

A shadow flickered in the room, and Ren Qingyue appeared out of thin air, sitting by Yan Zhao's bedside. She leaned down and gently touched Yan Zhao's soft, warm cheek as she slept.

It turned out she had misunderstood Yan Zhao. Yan Zhao wasn't trying to abandon her. Instead, Yan Zhao thought that she didn't want to form a contract because she wished to leave. But how could she leave? No one wanted Yan Zhao to be well more than she did.

As her emotions surged, Ren Qingyue gazed at Yan Zhao's face, realizing that what had started as a sense of respect for her master had changed. It was no longer the same feeling. How many times had she ignored the fluttering in her heart?

Was it when Yan Zhao first kissed her forehead? Or when Yan Zhao said she wanted to be her Dao companion? Or perhaps it was over the past four hundred days and nights of living and surviving together?

As Yan Zhao's senior sister, she had developed feelings that she should not have. Ren Qingyue felt guilt as she placed a hand on her chest. Before realizing her own selfishness, she had even instinctively wanted to take Yan Zhao from her parents and claim her as her own.

Yan Zhao had others now—like Xian Zun Yuan Qing, who accompanied her day and night, and Nangong Yin, who cared for her. There were also many friends along the way who lent her a hand. All along, she had believed that she was important to Yan Zhao. But Yan Zhao could also let go.

It turns out that she was the one drowning, clutching onto Yan Zhao like a life-saving straw. Her deepest fear was not merely that Yan Zhao would be disappointed if she discovered her true identity. What terrified her even more was that if Yan Zhao knew that the little fox was actually her senior sister, she might stop liking her.

As long as Yan Zhao didn't know the truth, she could continue enjoying the special treatment Yan Zhao gave her. She knew it was wrong. She knew she shouldn't act like this. Her moral compass was constantly being tested. Yet she had grown addicted to this dependency, unable to resist it.

She hoped Yan Zhao's gaze would stay on her for just a moment longer.

Ren Qingyue lay down beside Yan Zhao, gazing at her in the dim light. Asleep, Yan Zhao's face looked so peaceful, more serene than when she was awake. At some point, even her sleeping posture had become more orderly, no longer tossing and turning.

Yan Zhao had grown beyond her imagination. This child was getting smarter and smarter. How much longer could she keep her secret?

Ren Qingyue didn't want to think about the answer. She quietly stayed by Yan Zhao's side. This silent, deep night was her secret alone. Her selfish feelings could not be shared with anyone, and in front of others, she had to act like an innocent, harmless little fox.

Yan Zhao had a good night's sleep. She didn't dream, so she didn't get the chance to tell her mother about her smart decision. But that didn't matter. Yan Zhao wasn't disappointed. There would be plenty of chances in the future. She could tell her mother next time they met.