How To Love (Tyler Seguin)

Chapter 22

Tyler's POV

I hate road games. I hate being without Amy. Even if it's just for a day, I can't bear it. I just miss her so much.

I see her in everything I do. I see her in the sun shining in the sky. In the flowers blooming in the gardens. In the clouds when we're flying to a different city.

And I hear her. I hear her laugh when someone tells a joke. Her voice singing in the shower when I'm in there after a game. I hear her whisper my name when I fall asleep at night. Then I hear it again when I wake up.

She's everywhere. It doesn't matter how many miles or kilometres separate us. She's always there. In my mind. Toying with my emotions.

The worst part about being on the road is that I don't know what's going on back in Dallas. I don't know who Amy's with. Or worse, what they're doing together.

I've asked Drea to keep an eye on Amy for me when I'm gone. I asked Dylan the same thing. But if I know Amy, she'll find a way to sneak around.

When I'm on the road, away from Amy, girls constantly throw themselves at me. And I reject them every time. But I know that when she's away from me, and a guy throws himself at her, she won't say no.

I'm just hoping, praying, that I've changed her enough that she'll say no to these guys. That whatever feelings she has for me will stop her. That she'll just wait for me to come back to her.

Amy's POV

I don't know if road games are a blessing or a curse. Depending on how I think if it, it could be either or.

On one hand, I miss Tyler. I miss him hugging me, and holding me, and kissing me. I miss his scent, his laugh, his smile, and those stupid little dimples. I miss the safe feeling I have when I'm with him.

But on the other hand, with him gone, I can do whatever I want. I don't have to be scared of getting caught by him. I don't have to worry about him finding a hickey on my body that he didn't make. I can be the Amy I used to be. At least I try to be.

I go to clubs and bars, and I meet guys. Nothing ever happens though. I always talk myself out of it. The thought of Tyler is always in the back of my mind.

Unable to screw around with strange men at bars, I find myself going back to a familiar place. When I miss Tyler, I channel that feeling, that longing for Tyler, into another man.

When Tyler's gone, I make my way over to Mr. Collins' place. I go there during the late hours of night. We have sex and then I leave. I don't stick around to talk. I go there to get what I need, and then I'm out of there.

When I leave Mr. Collins' apartment, I go home and change into Tyler's clothes. I sleep with the teddy bear he gave me. I surround myself in his scent. Hoping that his scent can mask the truth of what happens when he's gone.

Tyler's POV

I knock on the door to Amy's house. Her dad is the one to answer the door, and he gives me a friendly hello.

"I've made breakfast if you'd like some," he tells me.

"No, I'm fine Mr. Smith. I already had breakfast," I say.

"Ok, but you can call me Jerard," he says with a smile.

"Well uhh Jerard, where's Amy?," I ask.

"She's still upstairs getting ready to go to school. She should be down soon. You're welcome to wait for her in the kitchen."

"Ok thanks."

I follow Amy's dad into the kitchen. I give Dylan, who's eating an omelette, a big hug. Then I take a seat next to him.