Forgiveness, Trust & Forever

Hero

I bought the ring on a Tuesday.
Not because Tuesdays were romantic.
They weren't.
Tuesdays involved script meetings, school runs, dance bags, forgotten water bottles and Eleanora insisting that dinosaurs should be allowed to eat cereal at the breakfast table.
But somehow, it felt right.
Ordinary.
Emily had taught me that the biggest moments in our lives didn't happen under spotlights.
They happened in kitchens.
On driveways.
During nursery pick-ups.
While folding washing.
While arguing over whether Eleanora really needed four different pairs of glitter trainers.
So I bought the ring on a Tuesday.
Jen knew.
Unfortunately.
"I assume you've checked the insurance?" she asked before she'd even congratulated me.
"Good morning to you too."
"I'm serious."
"I know."
"And don't you dare do it in public."
"I wasn't planning to."
"Good."
"And stop telling me what to do."
"I've represented you for years. You require supervision."
She wasn't entirely wrong.
Three weeks later, Freddie stood in my office at the production studios wearing a suit for his final fitting.
"You look nervous."
"I am."
"It's my wedding."
"I know."
"Why are you sweating?"
I looked at him.
"I'm proposing."
His grin nearly split his face.
"I KNEW IT."
Half the costume department looked over.
I sighed.
"You've somehow made my proposal about you."
"I've been practising for this speech since we were nineteen."
"You've written a speech?"
"Several."
"You're not speaking."
"I absolutely am."
"No."
He folded his arms.
"You're proposing to the woman you've loved for nearly twenty years."
"I know."
"The mother of your daughter."
"I know."
"The woman who still tells everyone you dropped your keys down a drain."
"I did."
"You deserve that."
"Probably."
He smiled.
"She's going to say yes."
I looked away.
"I hope so."
He laughed softly.
"Mate... she already has."
Natalie and Freddie's wedding was everything they were.
Elegant.
Expensive.
Beautiful.
Slightly chaotic.
Kelly complained about heels for six solid hours.
Anton still looked completely in love with her anyway.
Dad danced with Melinda.
Emily's dad danced with his daughter.
For the first time in years, every important person in our lives occupied the same room without lawyers, security briefings or fear sitting between them.
Clara-Bellas performed a short dance during the reception.
The women from The Velvet Room surprised Natalie with a glamorous, playful performance that had the entire room cheering.
Even my mum laughed until she cried.
Eleanora took her flower girl responsibilities incredibly seriously.
Until she spotted the dessert table.
Then she abandoned the petals halfway down the aisle.
Apparently cake outranked tradition.
Nobody minded.
Least of all Natalie.
Late that evening, after speeches, after dancing, after Eleanora had fallen asleep curled up across two chairs wearing tiny sparkly shoes and clutching Bunny...
I found Emily standing outside beneath strings of fairy lights.
She was looking up at the stars.
Exactly like she used to.
I slipped my hand into hers.
"You disappeared."
"I wanted a minute."
"You okay?"
She smiled.
"I think..."
She looked back through the windows.
At our friends laughing.
At Freddie spinning Natalie around the dance floor.
At Kelly and Anton arguing over music.
At both our families talking together.
At Mimi dancing with Teddy and Sammy while Eleanora slept nearby under the watchful eyes of every adult present.
"I think this is what healing looks like."
I followed her gaze.
"I think you're right."
She leaned against me.
"I used to think we'd never have this."
"I know."
"I'm glad I was wrong."
"So am I."
Silence settled between us.
Comfortable.
Warm.
The sort we'd once thought impossible.
I reached into my jacket pocket.
Emily immediately looked suspicious.
"What have you done?"
"Nothing."
"Hero."
"I might have done one thing."
She laughed.
"Oh no."
I turned to face her completely.
My heartbeat was ridiculous.
My palms were ridiculous.
Freddie, watching discreetly through the window, gave me an enormous thumbs-up.
I ignored him.
Mostly.
"Emily Dean..."
She looked at me.
Really looked.
The same way she had all those years ago when we first stood in the empty flat above Clara-Bellas dreaming about university.
The same way she had looked at me in hospital after Eleanora was born.
The same way she had looked at me when she finally came home.
"I've loved you as a teenager."
I took her hands.
"I've loved you when we were impossible."
I smiled through the tears already threatening.
"I've loved you when we were broken."
My voice cracked.
"I've loved you while waiting for you."
I lowered myself onto one knee.
"I've loved you while finding you again."
Emily covered her mouth.
"I don't want perfect."
I opened the ring box.
"I don't want easy."
A tear rolled down her cheek.
"I don't even want a life without arguments about dinosaurs, forgotten shoes, or your terrifying ability to judge my choice of watches."
She laughed through her tears.
"I just want every ordinary Tuesday for the rest of my life."
I looked up at her.
"My best friend."
"My home."
"The mother of our daughter."
"The love of my life."
"Emily..."
"Will you marry me?"
She didn't answer immediately.
Instead...
She dropped to her knees in front of me.
Wrapped both arms around my neck.
And kissed me.
When she finally pulled back, she was laughing and crying all at once.
"You idiot."
"I know."
"You've made me ruin my mascara."
"I'll buy more."
"You'd better."
She rested her forehead against mine.
"I've been waiting for you to ask."
My heart stopped.
"You have?"
"For months."
"I thought I was being subtle."
"You bought ring insurance, Hero."
I blinked.
"...Jen?"
"Jen."
I sighed.
"I'll deal with her later."
Emily smiled so brightly it stole the breath from my lungs.
Then she whispered the only answer I'd ever wanted.
"Yes."
The applause started before I'd even put the ring on her finger.
We both looked towards the windows.
Every single person was standing there.
Watching.
Natalie crying openly.
Freddie pretending he wasn't.
Kelly applauding with a smug smile.
Anton with his arm around her shoulders.
Mimi wiping away tears beside Melinda.
Both our parents smiling through tears.
Teddy and Sammy jumping up and down.
And right in the middle...
A sleepy little voice.
Eleanora had woken up just enough to blink at us through the glass.
She pointed towards her mummy's hand.
Then looked at Hero.
"Daddy..."
I smiled.
"Yes, Boo?"
She grinned.
"Mummy keeping you forever now?"
Everyone laughed.
Emily looked down at our daughter before back at me.
She squeezed my hand.
"Forever," she said softly.
And for the first time in our lives...
Forever no longer felt frightening.
It simply felt like home.