Ang Boyfriend Kong Engkanto (Published by Bookware)

Chapter 46: Inconsolable

Inalagaan ako ni Lady V sa mga panahong halos mabaliw na ako. She took care of me with utmost patience. I was inconsolable. I lost him. I lost Pio, the only man who has ever loved me. The only man who truly cared for me. I lost the biggest part of me.

I got sick for a few days after they took him away. I don't know why but it might be a self-induced illness. I wanted to just die. I want this pain to be over.

"Alex, you can't be like this." Lady V started to say but I just stared at the wall, unmoving. These past few days, she's been trying to talk to me but I wouldn't let her. I was stubborn. I was consumed with sadness as I wallowed in self-pity. I feel sorry for her but I can't help myself.

"Alex..." She sighed with frustration.

Just leave me alone. Or better yet, just kill me.

"You need to eat." She said as she tries to feed me. She's holding a spoon and a bowl of something but I don't want to eat.

"I want to die." I said without thinking.

"Alex!" She yelled at me and I was startled. I was forced to look at her glaring at me. She has finally unleashed all the pent up irritation that she's probably feeling towards me. I can't blame her. I know she's tired of me. I'm tired of myself too but I can't help myself.

Akala ko kaya ko pero hindi pala...

"Alex." She repeated but now in a calm manner after realizing how she had reacted. "I'm sorry. I know you're in a lot of pain but you can't go on like this. Sa tingin mo ba matutuwa si Pio sa ganitong kalagayan mo?" She asked but I didn't answer.

"Gusto mo bang masayang lang ang mga sakripisyo niya para sa iyo? Para makasama ka lang!" She stated, obviously annoyed by my indifference.

"I want to just die." I said and she gave out an exasperated sigh.

"No Alex. You'll get through this." She said, trying to convince me.

"Paano?" I asked desperately.

"Makakalimutan mo rin siya."

"No. I can't. Alam kong hindi ko siya makakalimutan. Sana ako na lang ang nagkasakit. Sana ako na lang."

"No. He won't allow it. If it was you, he'll trade place with you." She said and she gave out another heavy sigh. "He told me not to tell you this but I think you should know."

"I should know what?" She now got my attention. "What?"

"Do you remember when I went here to visit you?" She asked and I nodded. "That day I brought bad news which both of you already knew." I waited for her to continue.

"But, there was something else you didn't hear." Umiiling-iling siya. "While you were getting me tea..." She trailed.

"Yes, what about it?" I asked, eager to know.

"That was when I told Procopio about his father's plan."

"Pla--plano?!"

"Na kapag hindi kusang umuwi si Procopio ay gagawa siya ng paraan para ikaw na mismo ang sumuko sa kanya. That's what happened to Procopio. Nung una akala ko may sakit lang talaga siya but when I touched him, I felt my brother's power coursing through him. Doctors can't cure him. It was a spell made by him. Only he can undo it."

"Pero... Paano niya nagawa iyon kay Pio-- sa sarili niyang anak?!" Nanggagalaiti ako sa galit dahil sa nalaman ko. "Anong klase siyang ama?"

"He's ruthless, I know, pero hindi naman talaga niya binigyan ng sakit si Procopio. He's just sleeping. It was all up to you. The king knows that at some point you'll feel guilty and will eventually decide to turn him in. Which was exactly what you did." She explained with a frown.

"Bakit hindi mo sinabi sa akin?" I asked bitterly as if knowing it beforehand will change things.

"Dahil nakiusap si Pio na huwag kong sabihin sa iyo. Ayaw ka niyang iwan. Mas ginusto ka niyang makasama sa maikling panahon na meron siya. Alam niya ang kayang gawin ng ama niya at ayaw ka niyang mag-alala."

"Why? Hindi ko maintindihan." Naguguluhan ako. Bakit sa ganito pang paraan?

"I am sorry Alex kung naglihim ako sa iyo." She said regretfully.

Matagal akong hindi nakasagot dahil naguguluhan ako sa mga bagay-bagay. Bakit gano'n? 'Yon lang ba talaga ang paraan? Kailangan ba talagang mangyari iyon? Hindi ko maintindihan ang hari. Naisip ko na lang na kahit siguro ano pa ang nangyari, kahit alam ko pa ang plano ng hari, matutuloy at matutuloy pa rin ang balak niyang paghiwalayan kami.

"Will I ever see him again?"

"I'm afraid not. I'm sorry." And that was it. I cried and cried after hearing that. Alam ko na rin naman na hindi na talaga kami magkikita but hearing it from Lady V made it sound final. It's all over.

Humagulgol ako at yumakap sa kanya.

"Bakit gano'n?" Tanong ko habang umiiyak. "Bakit gano'n Lady V?" Huminga siya ng malalim na para bang kahit siya ay nasasaktan. Hinaplos niya ang likod at sinubukan akong patahanin pero lalo lang akong naiiyak.

"Bakit gano'n? Bakit gano'n?" Paulit-ulit kong tanong habang pinupunasan niya ang luha ko.

"I don't have the answer Alex. I'm sorry... but I know you can do it." She said reassuring me.

"Hindi ko kaya. Hindi ko po kaya." Hindi ko kayang pagdaanan ang sakit na ito. I feel so desperate kaya kung ano-ano ang tumatakbo sa isip ko ngayon.

"Yes you can."

Then an idea hit me. I looked at Lady V straight in the eyes.

"You have the power. Make me forget."

She looked at me with confusion written all over her face.

"Make me forget." I repeated.

"But Alex..." Lady V hesitated after finally realizing what I just said.

"You have to-you have to help me. I know you can do it. I've seen Pio do it."

"Pero Alex, iyan ba talaga ang gusto mo? Ang makalimutan si Pio?"

"Hindi. But you said it yourself, he's not coming back. I can't-- I don't know how to deal with this pain. Parang mababaliw ako." I cried again.

"Alex..." She said, still hesitant.

"Kailangan mong gawin 'yon dahil ngayon parang gusto kong magpakamatay." I shamelessly admitted because it's the truth. "Please, I beg of you. Please make me  forget."

"Okay. Okay. I'll do it." She answered after moments of thinking.

"Thank you. But first, will you help me with something?"

"Anything, dear."