To the moon || Luke Hemmings

Chapter 60

'What time are we waking up tomorrow?' Ashton asked.
It was 11pm and we were at the hotel we would stay in for tonight and tomorrow.
Melbourne was the only place left on our road trip, meaning that after this we would go back home to Sydney.
'It's the last day so we better make it a good one' Michael said as he yawned loudly.
'Yeah, should we do the usual? Meeting downstairs at 10?' Ashton suggested.
We all nodded in agreement before we told each other goodnight and went inside our own rooms.
I sighed as Luke closed the door behind us and dropped our bag.
'You go first' he mumbled as he laid down on the bed.
I didn't reply, instead I just quickly searched for my pyjama's, toothbrush and make-up wipes and walked inside the bathroom.
Quickly changing into my comfy pj's, I brushed my teeth and wiped my make-up off my face before walking back out, leaving on the lights because I knew Luke would go inside in a minute.
Luke looked up shortly as he saw me walk out of the bathroom and stood up, following the same routine as I just did.
I crawled under the blankets and sighed.
My head was pounding and my eyes were burning and I wanted nothing more than to go to sleep and not wake up for the next 5 years.
I waited for Luke to be done in the bathroom though, hoping that maybe we would be having one of our small conversations before we went to sleep, the way we did when Luke decided we should call Lilly "bubbles" or when we would just talk about random things.
When Luke was done, he turned off all the lights and sighed as he crawled under the blankets beside me.
We were quiet for a few seconds, neither of us really knowing what to say to the other.
I hated what we were becoming. I hated that I just couldn't think of anything to say to him.
We always had something to talk about but the sweet, laid back conversations we used to have just seemed inappropriate.
Luke cleared his throat as he rolled on his stomach and propped his arms under his pillow, his head resting on top of it as he closed his eyes.
'Goodnight V' he said softly.
I looked at the features of his face, as far as I could see them in the dark, and bit my lip.
The little spark of hope I had disappearing immediately.
'Goodnight' I replied.
I laid down on my back and looked at the ceiling, wondering how long it would take for me to fall asleep this time.
About 30 minutes passed like this, and I could hear Luke's breathing become heavier.
I rolled on my side and looked at him.
I looked at his mouth that was slightly agape and his arms that were still tugged under his pillow, his hair that was still in perfect shape and his shoulder blades that he hadn't covered under the blankets.
And I suddenly felt the need to touch him. I wanted to feel his skin against mine as we cuddled and told each other "I love you's", I wanted to feel his arms wrapped around my waist as we slowly drifted off to sleep.
I missed him. He was right here with me but I missed him more than I did when he was on tour for a year.
He seemed so out of reach now, he felt so far away.
Panic started rising up in my chest at that thought and as a way of reassuring myself, I pulled my hand away from under the blankets and placed it on Luke's arm.
It was strange how his touch could comfort me, even though he was asleep and unaware of what was going on.
I wanted to cry and scream and wake Luke up and ask him what we were doing but instead, I closed my eyes and enjoyed the warmth that was radiating off his arm, allowing it to calm me down and slowly push me closer to a state of unconsciousness.
That is, until he pulled his arm away and turned around, making it impossible for me to hold him.
Opening my eyes, I turned around, telling myself that this didn't mean anything.
He was asleep and completely unaware of what he was doing.
It was not intentional, and yet it hurt as if it was.
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A/N:
I PASSED MY EXAM! :D
This story is suddenly going so fast :(