"It's Not Love If It Hurts" //5sos

/54/

  It had been two days. Two days since anyone had seen from Calum. They all tried calling him, again and again. Luke must have called him a million times the first day. He called him before Lunch, and just in case, twice during it. He called him before bed. And then again, when he woke up from nightmares of black boots and white vans. Then he called him in the morning. And at the top of every hour. And whenever he felt especially scared.  And when he was worried about Calum. He called him a lot.

  Every time, it was the same. Directly to voicemail. Directly to voicemail. The automated message system, and then Calum's voice, instructing Luke to leave a message and he'll try to get back to him. "I'm sorry I couldn't answer in time, I'm most likely just to lazy to reach for my phone, but leave a message or send me a text and I'll try to get back to you." By the second day, every time Luke called, he felt sick hearing to the message. "I'll get back to you," it said, and "I'm sorry". It was sickening hearing Calum's voice when Luke knew he wasn't fine, there was no way he could be fine.

  He and Ashton and Mikey sat in the living room on the second night. The police had been informed hours upon hours ago, but Luke doubted they'd find him. At this point, he started to doubt anyone would find him.

  So the boys minus Calum sat in the living room, slumped on the couches, their phones turned on and in their hands but they weren't looking at the screens. At this point, none of them left their phones unattended, in case there was a call. They had searched and searched, but no clue to where Calum was. Finally, Ashton cleared his throat.

  "We need go decide what to do." He said, his voice sounding as if he'd rehearsed it. "Did anyone check his and Annie's place?"

  They all raised their hands, including Ashton. "No ones been there since Calum left to stay here," Michael intoned. "I went through their garage, since I knew the passcode. His stuff's all there." There was hidden meaning behind his words- he didn't run off. They hated to admit it, but ever since Zayn left One Direction, they were extra cautious, and the idea that any one of them might want to drop out at random was terrifying. But why would Calum leave- the thought made Luke taste bile, because he knew, that while maybe Calum would leave them, he could never leave Annie. Just the idea was sickening, but Luke knew it was true. They could grieve, and go on, never knowing where Calum ran off too, why their best friend left, but there was no way Calum could leave Annie like that. The boys wouldn't be okay for a while, but who knew when Annie would be okay. They loved each other. Calum would never do that to him.

  Please come back, even if it's just for Annie, Luke prayed, even though he didn't know who or what he was praying too. Don't leave us.

  Ashton coughed, "so I think we can safely assume he didn't run away. What are some other options."

  The words made Luke want to choke, but he forced them out anyways. "He could've been kidnapped. He's good looking, rich and famous, there's more than one reason he could've been taken away from us."

  Ashton nodded, and Luke could tell he'd thought about this over and over, with no clear answer. But Luke waited, regardless, fir Ashton to tell him where Calum was, as if Ashton knew. As if anyone knew.

  "He could've gotten in an accident." Mikey spoke up, having not said anything for a while. "He could've gotten in an accident and be laying on the road somewhere."

  Luke walked into the kitchen, as if in a daze, and threw up in the trash.

  "Don't worry," Ashton said, as if that'd help. "We searched all the roads on his way to Johanna's. We'd see if his car were crashed." That wasn't necessarily true, however. The car wouldn't still be there- neither would the body, if that were true. Ashton felt bile rise to his throat, but managed to keep it down. Mikey had already considered it, and had already gotten a huge migraine from the possibility.

  Silence filled the room. "Well, what could have happened then."

  Ashton scratched his head. "Maybe he got hit on the head, and has amnesia."

  "People don't just get amnesia every day," Luke argued, feeling utter desperation.

  "Maybe," Michael suggested, taking on a more silly tone as if that'd lighten the mood. "Maybe, he's a secret agent, and he was called out on an intergalactic mission to save the world!" He suggested, feigning a smile.

  Ashton and Luke didn't disagree. "Yeah. That's probably it."

  That night, Luke had nightmares. He had the same dream as the night before, where Calum was attacked and forced into a van, his phone crushed underfoot with a pair of big, black boots. It repeated over and over, only each time it was just a little more horrible. In one, Calum was drugged, and collapsed on the pavement. In another, he tried to fight them off, but was beaten and shoved in the van. In the last one, the worst one, he tried to fight them off, but one had a gun. Then, a gunshot rang out, and while Luke didn't see what happened, he knew that Calum had been shot. The dream ended with the same black pair of boots stomping Calum's phone, and the nightmare dissolved. Luke bolted awake, and for a horrible few minutes, he was positive that it was real. When he finally remembered it was a dream, there was no relief though. There was no relief, because he knew that it may have been real. It could still be real.

  Luke eventually went back to sleep. Feeling all that worry, all that fear, was utterly exhausting. But sleep didn't come with relief- instead, Luke dreamt of a car being towed away, Calum's car. The people in the truck said that the driver must have left, but Luke knew better. He watched in the dream as the car was towed. Underneath it lay Calum. But not Calum. This Calum was battered, bruised, with his limbs in abnormal positions. This Calum had dried blood coating his chin. This Calum was dead.

  Luke laid in bed with his lights turned on for the rest of the night after having that dream. And all of the rest of the night, he wondered- was his Calum dead too?