"It's Not Love If It Hurts" //5sos

/116/

  Calum walked into the kitchen, scratching his head, his hair messed up and his boxers slightly askew from sleeping. He had gotten up to make breakfast, but when he came into the kitchen he found two plates, each with two slices of toast on each. One had a container of butter. The other, a small jar of marmite.

  "You know the way to my heart." Calum beamed, picking up the plates and carrying them over to where Annie lay on the couch. "I'm guessing this ones supposed to be yours?" He said, passing her the plate with the marmite on it jokingly.

  "Bring that any closer and I'll be having you for breakfast instead of the toast." Annie said flatly, her eyes wide but her face expressionless.

  Calum raised an eyebrow, used to her comments by now. "How charming. I suggest you don't eat certain parts of me too quickly. Don't want to gag." He replied offhandly, spooning marmite onto his toast.

  Annie snorted, and she couldn't keep her lips from forming a smile. "Oh God, you're even worse in real life."

  "You pronounced 'better' wrong. And why'd you cut the crust off my toast?"

  "Because you're not a barbarian?" Annie exclaimed, taken aback at just the notion that Calum might eat the crusts on his bread. "Don't tell me you like the crust. That's grounds for breaking up."

  He shook his head, taking a bite of the bread. "You don't like marmite. Honestly, if anything's grounds for breaking up, that's it."

  Annie crossed her arms, still ignoring her plate. "It's not my fault my taste buds are more developed than yours."

  "You just called out an entire continent for having bad taste."

  "And what if I did?"

  "Cultural discrimination."

  "It'd be cultural appropriation."

  "No, I don't think it would."

  "You're insufferable. Don't patronize me just because I have a more eloquent and extensive vocabulary than you do."

  Calum wiggled his eyebrows. "I love it when you talk literary to me."

  Annie laughed, done teasing Calum. "I love it when you pretend you know what I'm saying."

**** ********************************** **********************

  Johanna's phone vibrated on her desk, and she opened it, typing in the password and click on the Twitter notifications- two of them.

  'I never thought I'd date anyone who ate the crusts on their toast yet here we are.'

  'If we ever break up, know that it was really just because she doesn't like marmite.'

  Oh joy, Johanna thought. They'll be extra lovely dovey today.

**********************************

  The other boys came over that afternoon, after work. They didn't bother calling first, but Luke still texted Calum so he'd know. As much as he would like taking him off guard, Luke definitely didn't want to come in to Annie and Calum naked on the couch.

  When they came in through the door (knocked once and then let themselves in), Annie's face immediately brightened. Luke sat on the couch opposite of where Annie and Calum were sitting, and Annie jumped up, leaping onto his lap.

  "Oh, um... hi? Annie?"

  "So glad you're here. Calum wants to actually do stuff, and I just want to sleep. Ash, pass me that blanket?"

  Ashton had a look on his face, like he'd excepted that this was his life, but was still waiting to wake up. "Fine. Here you go."

  Luke crossed his arms, waiting for Annie to finish adjusting herself in his lap. "Calum, I could always do stuff with you."

  Calum shook his head, doing his best to hide the little smile on his face. "Not unless you want to help me fix the toilet."

Annie elbowed him in the face lightly as she struggled to get situated. "Not unless you help me with my problem too. I've got a leak, and I think only could fix it."

  Calum squeezed his eyes closed, doing his best to ignore Luke's (very perverted) response. "Michael?"

  "Please. Anything to get away from Luke's bad innuedos."

  Calum lead Michael through his room, to the toilet that wasn't flushing in the bathroom.

  Meanwhile Ashton glanced at Annie and Luke awkwardly. Annie was sitting over his lap, with her feet pulled up onto the couch and the blacker tucked in around her. She rested her head on his shoulder, taking in a deep breath through her nose and exhaling through her mouth, closing her eyes.

  Luke blinked. "I always wondered what I'd be doing in my early twenties. Prime of my life, ya know? Somehow, I never expected this." He looked at the sleeping form draped over him.

  Ashton giggled quietly. "You never thought you'd be sitting on someone else's couch at 5 in the afternoon, with their girlfriend over your lap, as they fix the toilet?"

  Luke looked down at Annie's face, already asleep. "No, I completely expected this."

  Ashton's glance flickered to the tv. "Videogames?"

  "I guess." Luke reached an arm around Annie's waist, holding underneath her arm. The other snaked underneath Annie's knees, and he carefully stood up, cradling her.

  "Why not just leave her on the couch?" Ashton questioned.

  Luke sat down on the couch next to Ashton, balancing Annie in his lap and reaching for a controlled. "She's warm." He defended.