"It's Not Love If It Hurts" //5sos

/101/

  Annie had a problem.

  She was in too deep.

  Calum had only been away a few days, and she acted like she'd been gone months. Whenever he walked into the room, her heart would flip, and she'd start smiling uncontrollably. It was ridiculous. It was unhealthy. It was stupid.

  Oh God, she loved him.

  Calum wasn't quite as bad. He was good at being away from loved ones for long periods of time. But Annie- it was sad to think it, but she was used to being in her own. It was true, she loved her parents, because well, they're her parents. They may have problems and she may not want to be anything like them, but she still loved them. Her siblings too. But this was the first time she loved someone quite like this- where she was excited to just be around them. No, it wasn't excitement. It was something more- exhilaration, adoration,  complete and under infatuation that overwhelmed her in a sea of emotion and soul-crushing desperation. She was sinking in the ship she sailed, and as the waves rose up and crashed over her she found herself smiling a giddy, completely irrational grin that spread across her lips and traveled to every part of her face, so you could see her smile from her eyes, you could see her smile from her cheeks, you could practically smell and hear and taste her smile because it represented something more than joy. She found herself clinging onto every thought, every motion and every twitch of a breath, and relishing in every moment of every second. And, for a split second, she wondered if this is what it would be like to die- to melt into the floor in a sea of foamy warmth, a bathtub of suds and confusing laughter. Her world was the light you see as you are drowning, the way the darkness creeps up in your vision except she wasn't drowning, she was floating on her back and breathing deep breaths, filling up her lungs with every inhale so her rib cage was about to burst. Red spots danced across her vision, because it was painful, this feeling. She had never felt anything quite like it, and it wasn't natural, it wasn't normal, it wasn't healthy, it wasn't safe.

  It got to the point where it was no longer love, and it was no longer for Calum. It was bitter excitement, at the idea that not only was she so deeply engulfed in this feeling of utter pure love, but that at least on some end, it was reciprocated.

  Annie was loved. She was loved. She was loved.