"It's Not Love If It Hurts" //5sos

/13/

I was rereading "It's Not Rape If You Like It", and some of the beginning chapters are so awkward I can't believe I wrote them. Wtf was wrong with me.

More importantly, Wtf is wrong with you guys for continuing ready it! Some of those chapters are so, so, sooooo horrible like why r u this way @chapter10

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Anger

  Ever since Luke had stayed over, Annie had started putting real effort into her recovery. She had to recover, right? It couldn't always be like this.

  Annie didn't want to pretend it didn't happen anymore. She was tired of pretending it didn't happen. It happened, and it hurt, and the last two months Annie had been recovering with very little results. She was afraid that one day he'd appear at their door and it'd happen again, and the worst part was she knew it was possible! He was still out, he was still free, he could do whatever he wanted.

  Annie couldn't help feeling angry. He did this to her, he hurt her, and now Annie is having to live with the consequences of his actions. It just wasn't fair.

  She was glad she had stabbed him.

  That didn't make her any less angry, though. She hated him, hated what he did to her, hated how it effected her. Why did this have to happen? And if even it had to happen, why did Annie still have to deal with it? Why couldn't she be better?

  So, later that day, when Calum asked Annie to go on a walk with him, she agreed, much to his surprise. They bundled up (as it was getting chilly) and stepped outside.

  Annie took in a deep breathe. She could do this.

  They walked down the pavement, Annie taking everything in. The way the sidewalk felt different from the carpet and wood floors of their house, the way the trees looked half bare.

  Annie had her arms crossed as the decended the driveway, as if they were hiding her from the world. But, as they got to the end of the driveway, Calum turned to her with a proposal.

  "How about," he said, and you could see the smile growing on his face. "How about you put your hood up," he said, pulling it up for her, "and uncross your arms."

  Annie sucked in a breathe, but slowly uncrossed her arms.

  Eyes closed, breathe in, breathe out, eyes open, alright.

  They started walking again, until Calum offered another proposal- his hand.

  Annie shouldn't. Last time-

  Fvck last time, Mikey was a twat.

  Annie gripped his hand and they started walking again.

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  An elderly couple sat on their porch, rocking on their chairs and talking fondly to one another. They did this every night, watching the sunset and talking about their day.

  Today, however, it was colder than usual, so they were both wrapped in warm blankets. "No one but us would be crazy enough to be outside in this weather," the man said with a little smile.

  But he was proven wrong when a young couple walked past them. They held hands and walked slowly, the girl looking around as if she had never been outside. The boy however, only looked at one thing.

  Her.

  "I remember when we were that young," the elderly woman said wistfully.

  Her husband laughed, a far off look on his face. "Yes... It was so simple back then."

  They watched the couple pass, thinking back to when times were easy and joints weren't stiff. They imagined what the boy and girls life was like together- living together, maybe recently engaged or even married. The man guessed they took walks like that often. The woman guessed they were high school sweethearts.

  Neither of them were right, but for Annie and Calum it felt almost as if they were normal. Annie imagined a life where they were happy, and everything was perfect. She imagined a normal first date, normal drama and a normal relationship. Calum just imagined being with Annie in this moment forever.