Home (Grey's Anatomy Series)

With or Without You

Taking off my scrub cap, I walk out of the O.R room and into the hallway. The coldness of the oxygen in the air rippled through my body, sending goosebumps up my arms

"Hey..." I whisper to Amelia as I sit down on the floor with her.

"Hey."

"...they just rolled Herman out of the room, taking her up to ICU. Edwards did good, close her up I mean."

Staring down at the floor, Amelia doesn't make eye contact with me. Instead, she held her legs tighter to her body.

"You know, I asked Webber to call Derek. So that he could take this surgery..." She whispered.

"Why?"

"I was scared...and I knew that you wouldn't do it, respect to Herman's wishes."

"You go first...and I fix it after," I add.

"Yeah, but when you came in there...I felt relieved. Someone was coming in to save the day."

"You know, I wasn't going to come in. I held onto the jacket and watched as you paced back and forth in the room, that when I realized that I was exactly where I was 8 years ago. I'm almost 28 now, and I still feel that sick feeling every time I have a patient."

"You get scared?" She asks.

"It would be impossible not to be."

Looking up at the people walking out from the gallery, Jackson waited for me down the hall.

"You ready?" He asked.

"I'll be right there..."

"Thank you...for coming in there," Amelia said as I started to get up

"No problem..." I said looking down at the floor and then at the doctors coming down from the gallery.

"We make a really good team, you and I."

"Amelia-"

"Look I know I've been really unfair to you your entire life, and I hated you for coming and tearing this family apart...but I realized you're the only thing that makes me better."

Looking at her, it seems like she had been crying for a few minutes, probably since she left the O.R.

"Amelia, we don't work. We can't work...I don't know why, but we can't be in a room together without someone yelling at the other."

"So, you don't want to work with me."

"It's not that I don't, I can't. Because every time I think of you or see you...all I see is your body on the bathroom floor, covered in your own vomit."

"I've changed-"

"I know. But you were dead for 15 minutes...before Derek or I could revive you. I was 13 years old, watching my older sister on the floor." I whisper to her, keeping my words just between us.

"So, I'm just the other Shepherd, right? The shadow of Derek and Elena Shepherd."

"We're a duo, that's just how it is. Now, you and Edwards...maybe something's there."

Walking away from Amelia, I meet up with Jackson.

"What was that about?"

"Just some sister bonding..."

"With no yelling? Whoa.."

"Shut up." I chuckle

"So, where to now?" He asks as we step into the elevator.

"I thought you were going to be with April?"

"She left, after the surgery. So not I'm here, with you...what's next?"