God Bless The Broken Road (Jonathan Toews)

The "D" Word

Maisie

Today is Jacksons birthday and I couldn't be more excited to celebrate with him! He would be turning a whopping four years old and I can't believe my little boy was growing up so quickly. He learns new words every day, sadly it's a hockey vocabulary he's become accustomed to. That's going to make for a great conversation when he starts up preschool. Jonathan came over early with the cake and balloons and we decorated a little. Red and black streamers complimented the balloons and the room was finally ready. I never did have a birthday like this, I was a little jealous but I couldn't think about that right now. Jackson needed me to be strong and that's what I planned to do. Jonathan had a surprise for him but we were going to open gifts first. After getting the presents set up and candles in the cake we join Nicole to go wake up Jackson.

"Hey birthday boy, wake up" I say softly shaking him. He lets out a moan and rolls over in his bed.

"Consider this your warning mister, if you're not coming out of bed we're coming in" I warn and he starts to giggle. We all hop on his bed and attack him with tickles until he comes out from under the blankets. I wrap him in a tight hug and place kisses all over his face until he stops struggling.

"Happy birthday baby" I smile and he places a kiss on my cheek.

"Thanks mommy" he smiles back. Jonathan tosses him over his shoulder and brings him into the decorated living room.

"Woah! This is so cool" he cheers running around playing with the balloons once Jon set him down. I coral him over to his cake and his eyes light up. We got a Blackhawks Indian head cake with his name written across the bottom. I light the candles and we sing to him as he closes his eyes and blows the candles out. I wonder what he wished for? We eat the cake and enjoy the extremely unhealthy breakfast, much to Jonathan's displeasure.

"Alright buddy, gift time" Jon says picking Jack up and placing him in the middle of the pile on the floor. He takes no time digging in and opening the biggest ones first. He gets a new play place courtesy uncle Patrick who had to do promo this morning so he couldn't be here. Aunt Nicole got him some new clothes and shoes he so desperately needed and more toys because we didn't have enough. He opens my present last and I place it in his lap before returning under Jonathan's arm. He rips it open and nearly loses it. Inside was a fresh pair of hockey skates and hockey gloves Jonny helped me pick out. He says they're the best around and of course I trust his opinion.

"Woah! No way, are these for me" he asks and I laugh.

"I sure can't fit in them" I joke and he lights up. Jonny helps him put them on and tie them up. He stands up with a smile permanently plastered on his face. He was a bit wobbly but it didn't matter, he was finally on his way to being a hockey player.

"What do you say we try these bad boys out" Jonathan asks and I thought Jack was going to topple over in excitement. He gets the skates off and changes out of his pajamas as I get stuff together to go to the ice rink. I pack a bag and wait for him to get ready.

"Hey pretty mama, I got you something too" Jonathan says handing me a box.

"Jonnnn" I wine and he rolls his eyes.

"They're ice skates goof ball, you're going to need these" he laughs opening the box to show the skates and I face palm at my stubbornness. Naturally Jackson put on one of his now many Toews jerseys and we head over to Johnnys Ice House for his first ever skating lessons. I was a little nervous he would hit his head but I know Jon has him.

At first he fell a few times but he picked it up quickly. Better than I did at least. And now that he's finally on the ice I don't think I'll ever get him off.

"I think you got a future hockey player on your hands" Jonathan says skating up to me.

"Yeah? He sure does love it" I admit. He skates over to us and runs straight into Jonny's legs nearly bouncing straight off of them.

"Okay, next lesson how about we learn how to stop" Jon laughs.

"This is the best day ever! Thanks dad" Jackson says wrapping his arms around Jon's legs giving him a tight squeeze. We both freeze as Jackson skates away and does the drills Jonathan set up for him earlier. I look to Jon with so much fear in my eyes. I didn't want Jonathan feeling like he has to have fatherly responsibilities for him and I really didn't want Jonathan breaking that little boys heart by telling him he can't see him that way. If Jackson got his heart broken I wouldn't know what to do. There's so many ways this could go bad and I was freaking out.

"I'm so sorry, I'm not sure where he got that idea from. I'll talk to him later" I whisper.

"Mae, calm down. I know what you're thinking and it isn't anything like that. It's okay, he can call me dad if he wants. I'm not scared of that word and I'm not going to leave because he thinks of me as his dad. I love that little boy and that hasn't changed. I promise" he says skating close to me. I look into his deep brown eyes and I could tell he wasn't lying to me. I nod slowly and he lifts my chin so I have to look in his eyes. He places a passionate kiss on my lips because he knew that was the only way to keep me from over reacting. Now my heart was beating out of my chest for a totally different reason. We break apart and I stare back into those eyes. It's hard to believe that he's real, no one is this perfect.

We head home and grab lunch before the birthday boy passes out on the couch. I place a blanket over him and pick up all the wrapping paper and boxes then throw them away.

"Thanks so much for today" I say to Jon and he grabs his jacket.

"You don't have to keep thanking me Maisie, I love being with you guys and watching Jackson grow up. I do these things because it makes me happy, not because I feel like I have to. Your pretty little face is thanks enough" he says and I start to blush.

"So we have a two week away trip coming up" he starts.

"I know. I'm gonna miss you... a lot" I sigh. This was for sure going to put a cramp in things.

"I'm gonna miss you too. But you've done so well without me up until a few months ago so I know you can do it" he smiles.

"Yeah, but it's better when I go through it with you" I reply.

"You're not making this any easier" he singsongs and I laugh.

"Sorry. Go kick ass and come home safe" I say wrapping my arms around him.

"Yes mam" he jokes and I giggle into his chest. He leaves a kiss on my forehead and with that he was gone.