I WANT HIM, I WANT HIM NOT (MICHAEL JACKSON FANFIC)

Chapter 41

I wipe the blood from my lip with a wet washcloth and just stare at the broken, battered reflection. A tear rolls down my cheek and I wince because it's burning. All of this because I asked was he cheating. I know he is. A man who isn't wouldn't go off on a woman he supposedly loves like this unless he was guilty. But although I got the worst end of it, I got a few hits in and got away from him, and I've been locked in our bathroom ever since. I am, however, afraid to come out of the bathroom just in case he's standing on the other side of the door like he was earlier. I continue staring at what he's done to my face and think about all the other times when suddenly I start to feel enraged.
"He told you no more, but he lied." I whisper to my reflection. "Just like all the other times. The only difference is he held out a year. But I'm not taking it this time. I won't let him kill me."
I unlock the bathroom door and slowly turn the doorknob. I open the door and peak through the crack to make sure the coast is clear. When I see it is, I walk out of the bathroom, slowly and grab my awaiting suitcase under the bed. I've packed this suitcase the first time David hit me, but I never had the courage to leave. Now I do. Sure he hasn't hit me in almost a year, but I've warned him too many times and now I'm done. I open the bedroom door and close it behind me so he can think I'm still inside. I have no idea where he is, but hopefully he's in the den or his office or gone. I carefully walk down the stairs without making a sound and walk out the front door. I run to my car, throw my suitcase in the back, and get in. I start the engine and speed down the gravel driveway and out onto the road. I don't know where to go. I know I can't go to Giselle because she's with Michael and we're at odds, so my only option is a hotel. It starts thundering out of nowhere and it frightens me a bit. Next thing I know, it starts to pour down raining and I turn on the windshield wipers. After a couple of hours of driving, I pull into the parking lot of a hotel. I park in a space, turn off my car, and grab my suitcase. My phone starts ringing and I take it out of my purse, and look at the screen. I scoff, hit ignore, and pick up my suitcase. I walk through the lobby door and once the concierge looks up from the papers on her desk, her eyes widen. Yeah lady, I know I look like shit.
I give a small smile. "Hello, I need a room. Are there any available?"
She starts typing away at her computer. "Yes ma'am, there are."
"I would like one, non-smoking, for 3 days."
She starts typing at her computer again and my eyes wander around the elegant, but quiet lobby until my phone rings, again. I don't even pay attention to the screen because I already who it is and hit ignore, again. The concierge gives me the price, I pay with cash, of course, because David might freeze my account and he can't trace cash like a credit card, then she hands me my key.
"Enjoy your stay."
I grab my suitcase and head upstairs to my room. I turn on the lights, sit my suitcase down, and once again, my phone rings. I really wish he stops calling me because I don't have anything to say him and all he's going to say is that same tired ass line that he's sorry. I hit ignore, then put my phone on silent. I go in the bathroom, plug the tub, then turn on the faucet. Once the tub is filled, I strip out of my clothes and sink into the warm, but a little on the hot side, water. I stare ahead of me in a daze when suddenly I just start sobbing. I don't know how long I've been in the tub crying, but it had to be long enough for the water to get cold. I get out of the tub and leave the bathroom with a towel wrapped around me. I go to my suitcase and get a pair of panties and a bra out. I unwrap the towel so I can dry off, lotion up, and put my panties and bra on. I turn off the lights and get under the covers. I start thinking about what my next move is going to be. And whatever it is, I have 3 days to figure it out. After tossing and turning, I soon find a comfortable enough spot to fall asleep.

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I'm awaken out of my sleep by people arguing. I get out of bed and head downstairs. I go over to the front door where Michael, and now I know the other person is David, is having a shouting match.
"Fellas, what's going on?!"
They stop arguing and David looks toward me.
"Giselle, do you know where Jaslene is?"
"No. The last time I saw her was the day before yesterday. Did she not come home?" I asked, worried.
"Yeah, she did. It's just...we had an...argument last night and I was in my den and I fell asleep. When I woke up, I went upstairs to our room and she was gone. Some of her clothes, as well."
"And that's supposed to be our problem?" Michael says, folding his arms over his chest.
"Michael." I say through clenched teeth. I look back at David. "Have you tried calling her?"
"Of course. That's the first thing I did and been doing all morning."
"Then something should've told you that she doesn't want to talk to your ass instead of coming to my house and harassing me and my woman!"
"Harassing you?! I only came here because of Giselle! You know those two are like this!" He says, putting up two crossed fingers. "You know. Like how you and I used to be."
"Yeah, well, who ruined that?!"
"Guys, please! It's not about either one of you! It's about Jaslene and making sure she's safe! Now, David I'm going to call Jaslene, but if I can't get through to her either, then just give her some time. I'm sure she'll come back."
He nods and I go upstairs to get my phone. I go through my contacts and call Jaslene's number. It rings and rings, but no answer. I call two more times and leave a message. I leave the room when my phone rings and I see Jaslene's name on the screen.
I answer. "Oh thank God. Are you ok? Where are you?"
"I'm fine. And I'm at a hotel."
"Well David-"
"Please. I don't want to hear his name."
"But you have to at least tell him that you're alright. He's really concerned."
"Yeah. Sure he is."
"Jas." I say, sighing. "Is something going on between you two?" It's silent on the other end. "You know whatever it is you can tell me."
She lets out a breath. "It's nothing. I just need my space. But I have a favor to ask of you."

"What is it?"
"Can I stay at your condo for awhile? Just until I'm ready to go back home?"
"Of course you can. Do you still have the key?"
"Yeah." It's silent until she speaks, again. "And Elle?"
"Yeah?"
"Don't tell, David. Just tell him I'm alright."
"I'll do that."
We wrap up the conversation and I head back downstairs.
"I got in touch with her and she's fine."
"Did she say where she was?"
"No." I lied. "All she said was to tell you that she's alright."
"Now that you got the answer you wanted, could you kindly get the fuck off my property?"
David's about to response, but he stops himself. "Thanks again, Giselle."
"No problem."
He gets inside his car and drive out of the driveway. I close the door and turn to Michael.
"Remind me to get my code for my gate changed."
I shake my head. "You could've had a bit more compassion, Michael. I mean it wouldn't have killed you to be nice. If it were you looking for me-"
I'm cut off by Michael pressing his lips to mine and his hands cupping my face.
He soon pulls away. "Stop fussing at me."
"I'm not fussing. I just think you could've been nicer."
"Well, he lost that privilege when he ended our friendship and did this and this to me." He says, pointing to each bruised area. "Now let's not fight. We just made up."
I nod my head. "You're right." I say throwing my arms around his neck and kissing those soft lips. I pull away, smiling. "So, what would you like for breakfast?"
He doesn't respond, he just smirks before dropping down to one knee. He slowly glides his hands up my thighs and under my nightgown. He grabs ahold of the hem of my panties, then pulls them down. I step out of them, never taking my eyes from his. He puts one of my legs on his shoulder and I brace myself against the door.

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After I finished talking to Giselle, I took a shower and got myself dressed, and went downstairs for some continental breakfast. I didn't really see anything I wanted, but I went on ahead and grabbed a bagel with cream cheese and apple juice. I go back upstairs to my room and sit the stuff down on the table. My phone rings, since I took it off silent after I saw Giselle called me, and I pick it up to see David's name on the screen this time. Should I answer it? Or just hit ignore? I hit the answer button.
"Jassy?" I don't say anything. "Jassy, baby, I know you're on the phone. Please speak to me."
I let out a breath. "What do you want, David?"
"I want you to tell me where you are."
"I can't do that."
"Why not?"
"I just can't David, alright?"
"Baby, we need to talk so that-"
"So that we can work it out." I say, finishing his sentence.
"Yeah. Don't you want to do that?"
"I don't know."
"What do you mean you don't know?" He says, brokenly. "Don't you love me?"
"This has nothing to do with love. I-I just need my space, ok?"
He's silent before letting out a breath. "Ok. Whatever you want. But answer me one thing."
"What is it?" I say, slightly annoyed.
"Do you still love me?"
A part of me, my heart, is saying yes, but another part of me, my mind, is saying hell no and end this relationship right now because I can't keep accepting this type of behavior from him.
"I don't want to answer a question like that when my emotions are all over the place."
"Fair enough. But know that I still love you and I'm going to get some help, Jassy. I really am because the last thing I want you to do is to walk out of my life. I mean that. Anyway, I don't want to hold you up any longer. And thanks for answering my call."
"Mhm. Goodbye, David."
"Bye."
I hang up. I know he told me he was getting help so I could run back in his arms. However, if he's really serious about it, then good for him, he needs it. But if he thinks that's going to make me take him back, then he better think again.