The Daily Journal of an Average Teenaged Girl

Entry #13: 3-8-14

Knock knock knock.

I sigh.

"Yes?"

My brother walks in, cradles the cat and says, "You're still asleep??"

Uhh, yeah. It was only 11:30am

He invited me to eat breakfast with him, so I did. Then after breakfast, I walk into my living room, and spot my viola.

That's right! I wanted to play my viola yesterday! But I didn't have time. I haven't played my viola, not including last week, for two months! So I started to open my case.

Collin, sounding offended, said, "You're going to play that?"

"..Yeah. I've been wanting to play this for forever now." I reply.

"I was just hoping we could watch a movie."

At 12:00 o clock in the afternoon?, I think.

"But.. I wanted to play my viola.." I say, feeling guilty.

"Well then, can't you play it upstairs?" He says, sounding aggravated.

"What's wrong with playing my viola??" I fume.

"Ugh, what ever, I'm going to my room."

I don't understand. I put up with all of the things he likes. He blasts his rap music, he talks to me about gums, I play Black Ops with him when I don't want to, and all this other stuff, and I can't play my viola when I want to? Bullshit.

So then after trying to learn Harry Potter's theme, aka Hedwig's Theme, he comes back down.

Basically he said he still wants to watch a movie. I said, again, what's wrong with letting me play music. He said he doesn't care for that stuff, and hides in his room again.

So now I'm determined to learn a song that everyone knows. And maybe he'll appreciate my Viola and I a little more. Clocks by Coldplay. I have the first part of the song digitally, and I have some of it in my head.. easily played.

But then 1:30pm came around, and Mom was on the phone. I, being respectful, stopped playing, hoping I can play for her when she was done. I gave up and packed it in its case at 2:30pm.

I guess that's all my viola playing for today.

So then, I ate lunch and got dressed.

I was excited. I was going to the musical The Wizard of Oz for my school. I couldn't wait!

Then I got into an argument with my brother. I rather not talk about it.

Then David was able to pick me up at 4:30. I was so happy to get out of that house. There was ice in front of my door, so David had to hold my hand to get across. The reason why I mention this is because the way our hands held was like those prince and princess ways. It felt weird.

When I got there, I sat on the floor and enjoyed the set up. I wished I could help. I wish I never had the surgery. Because then, I would be part of the whole thing. But I have to remember that next year not only will I be part of the play and musical, but marching band as well.

Before I left, mom gave me an extra $10. So I left the house with $20.25. Gee.

I also was told to save seats for David's family. His sister, his brother, and his mom. His mom and brother love me. I've only seen his sister a few times.

But, anyway, watching all of the drama before the show was fun. It brought memories back.

Quiet a few memories....

Woo!!

So, I watched the play, which was awesome, me, Mac,David, Kate and others went to IHOP. Which was also very fun. Then David drove me home.(at 12:10am)

And, as usual when he drives me home, we talk. And we really get deep and personal. And well, some thing that were said I really enjoyed. We actually got on the subject of us. Like, woah. I don't remember how this was mentioned, but.. We were talking about "liking" people, and dating. Soo...

"You know that I do admire you.." David mused.

"Well, yeah, but not like that." I reply.

He paused. "Well... A bit, yeah."

Trying not to let the huge ping in my heart show, I asked skeptically, "Really?"

"Yeah. I mean, we've been hanging out a lot, and we've become great friends, and yeah, that is how good relationships start..."

In general, he told me he's having a hard time figuring himself out. And we talked for a while on my driveway to. He said he's afraid that if were to ever date, he'd be afraid to loose our friendship if anything went wrong. I reassured him that, even if the worst happened, I would still be his friend. I mean, if I can forgive a guy cheating on me with the same girl 3 times, what could possibly be worse??

Then, some where in the conversation, I had said, that he can tell me anything. Even if I hate whatever it is. And he nodded, and understood that it's hard for me, [really hard], to listen to him when he talks about other girls. And he confessed, (I'm 99.9% I heard correctly), that it's hard for him when I talk about Mac. I'm really surprised. I seriously had no idea. Like. Whoa.

We also established that we both miss the feeling of hugging and holding hands.

So, a we departed,[at 12:40am] he was determined to call me when he got home.

He finally called, and he was so adorably tired. But we talked until around 3:30am. Then we accidentally hung up, so I texted him that I was just going to let him sleep. And he responded he was about to say the same thing, 'Goodnight Sharpie, love ya.'

"Love you too. X) night" I sent with my heart shaking.

So... this just makes me think. Does tho mean anything?? Who knows, I tell myself. I follow the advice I gave him about being unsure about how he feels; Go With The Flow. Whatever happens, happens. Let it happen.

So, until next time,

Keep Smiling!

~Sharpie