NewScapeGang Oneshots

[Crack Short] The Big Group Of.... Lovers...

  Ashlie: Hi I'm Ashlie and this is my boyfriend Nick and his boyfriend Tommy

Person: wait how does that work?

Ashlie: Well, Nick is gay for Tommy but straight for me, and..... I just hate Tommy.

Tommy: *Thumbs up and grabs Nick's hand*

Ashlie: Also Jon's in love with me but since he knew I was in a relationship with a gay man he decided to date Dawn, but I didn't want to make him feel left out so we're all just a big dysfunctional group of lovers, but we don't care. We all care about each other and that's what matters.

Jon: We're just friends!..... With benefits.

Person: What about Cory and Uni?

Ashlie: oh they're just making out in the corner over there.

Person:

Person: I meant in relationship terms...

Ashlie: Oh! *Shrugs* They aren't really active much, but if they are on some days, Cory cuddles with Jon or Dawn just because they're cinnamon rolls. And Uni likes to cuddle with Tommy and Nick because Dawn and Jon were taken..... And I just record it all.

Person: what about... Those days?

Jon: Those days? Oh you mean like days where we go to the amusement park? *Innocent face full with pure*

Ashlie:

Person:

Ashlie: *Inhales and hugs Jon* Cinnajon you are too innocent.

Ashlie: *Pushes him into closet*

Ashlie: *Whispers into Person's ear* we don't do them because they could scar the Cinnajon.

Ashlie: Unless you're talking about Uno!

Ashlie: Then we just brutally ruin our relationship until we cuddle with each other.... Then play Nintendo cuz Uni is still salty about losing.

Person: what about when you are all together?

Ashlie: Well there's this thing called a giant....

Person:

Ashlie:

Ashlie: Cuddle party! :D

Persons *Sighs* oh thank god

Ashlie: What?

Jon: *Pokes head out of closet* What?

Cory: Basically if we're all together we cuddle cause when we're together we feel whole and nothing could be better than cuddling with our lovers while we exchange loving words to each other while we nuzzle our face into our lovers chest, well the closest lover we have... Because we need to hear their heartbeat, making sure that they're comfortable and safe with us, we love being nurtured or nurturing our lovers.

Uni: Also because we don't have a big enough blanket.

Cory: yeah basically.

Dawn: Also if we fight over a blanket at least one of us get sent out with a black eye

Ashlie: *Raises her hand* And I'm mostly responsible...

Uni: *Raises his hand* I once accidentally punched Nick because he touched my Nintendo  on accident while struggling to get off the bed.

Nick: I have never felt so much pain *Gets hugged by Dawn*

Dawn: it's okay

Nick: Also when we are alone we sometimes break down.

Ashlie: wait no we don't.... *sweating profusely*

Nick: I found you curled up against a corner while crying.

Ashlie:

Nick: I had to cuddle with you for hours.

Ashlie: .... I like cuddles

Dawn: Also Tommy was screaming for Nick and Ashlie while punching the wall and also screaming "YOU'RE GOING DOWN GREEN TEAM!" Even though the wall was yellow.

Tommy: wE ALL DO BUT SOMEONE KEEPS HOGGING THE CUDDLES—

Tommy: *Gets smacked with a book*

Jon: *Jumps on Tommy's back and strokes his head*

Jon: shhhhh..... Shut the fuck up and I'll cuddle with you.

Tommy:

Tommy: k.

Person: how did you all fall in love with each other?

Everyone: *Looks at each other and shrugs*

Nick: it just happened.

Ashlie: wELP ENOUGH QUESTIONS TIME TO LEAVE

Person: wait I— *Gets thrown out a window*

Ashlie: *Claps hands* Well that's dealt with! Who wants to cuddle?

Everyone: *Raises their hand*

Ashlie: good.