An Angels Sin

Can't Do This

Catalina's POV
I've been avoiding Draven all week. Its not that I'm scared of him, but I'm scared that I'll hurt him. I'm jumping away from almost everyone's smallest touch as if they are going to do what Ray does. My waist still has healing bruises from his tight grip.
"He's been asking about you," Tori says as she walks into my room. I stay looking out the window, not saying anything. "He told me what happened at the hospital. Why would you do that to him? Do you understand how much he likes y-"
"Yes, I know," I snap, turning towards her. She looks stunned by my change in attitude. "What happened had nothing to do with him." She leans against my bookshelf.
"Then why are you avoiding him?" She asks. I feel like this is turning into twenty questions. "It hurts him and when he's in pain, he shuts down. This is the first time on a very long time, he's been himself."
I fiddle with the ring in my hand. "I'll go see him later," I tell her. She gives me a small peak of a smile and stand up straight.
"He works at the auto shop downtown. If you know what's good for you, you'll go see him there," she tells me. I don't know what she meant by that, but okay.
×××××××
I know what she meant by that. Hot damn. I know that some girls have a fantasy about guys working on a motorcycle or car shirtless and looking very attractive, but the real thing is right on front of me.
I stand in front of the car awkwardly, waiting for him to notice me. "Hey," he says, finally realizing. His eyes don't soften like they usually do when he looks at me.
"Um, I'm sorry," I rush out. He wipes the grease off his hand and throws the rag on the top of a tool box. He makes his way over and stops at a good distance. "At the hospital, something happened and I was scared. I shouldn't of reacted that way towards you when you didn't do anything, but I was honestly terrified."
He crosses his muscular arms and sighs, looking down at the grease stained ground. "It hurt, I'll admit. But you really know how to hurt me and what you did felt like a stab."
"Pushing you away wasn't the ri-"
"I'm not talking about pushing me away, I'm fine with that. It's the fact that you went to James instead of me. When you told him not to let go of you, I got jealous cause I know that you may never be that way with me. You love him."
I bite down on my lip. "I do love him, but not in the way you think. He's been my best friend since elementary school. He believes me when I tell him things. You think I'm not jealous of the relationship you and Tori have? I'm extremely jealous of it." My hair falls in front of my face, but I don't bother to move it. "Ray, he-he tried ra-"
"He raped you?" I hate that word. I look down, for some reason ashamed that it happened again.
"I managed to stop him, but he still got to his destination for a few minutes. When I ran out of the room, I bumped into you. I was in shock. When I told my parents what Ray did the first time, they didn't believe me cause he was such a good kid. James was the only one who did, so I knew he would listen. I haven't told him what happened, but you deserve an explanation."
His jaw and fists clench. "That son of a bitch is dead," he says. What is scary is the fact that he sounds and seems serious. I grab his arm and yank him back to me. I rest my hand on his chest, feeling his heart beating rapidly.
"Don't," I tell him. "Can- can you just hold me for a little bit?" He slowly wraps his arms around my waist and kisses the top of my head. I close my eyes and relax against him. "I'm sorry."
"Its okay." I look up and kisses his jaw. He bends down to capture my lips with his. Our tongues brush against each others. He straightens up and sets me on the hood on the car. I press my lips his collarbone as he unbuttons my shirt.
He let's out a sexy growl as I kiss his Adams apple. He tilts my head up and kisses me passionately. His hands grips me, making me moan I to his mouth. We grind against each other, wanting to be a close as our bodies will allow.
Out of nowhere I get a flashback of Ray's hands roaming my body, pulling my hair, using me as some sex toy. I remove my lips from Draven's and look outside. He moves his lips to my neck. "St-stop," I say beginning to panic. He steps back a little and gives me a concerned look.
"Are you okay? Was that too much?" He asks. I nod violently.
"I don't think I can do this," I say quietly, buy in a way he can hear me. He takes my hand.
"Do what?" He asks. I blink back tears. He makes me happy and content, but I can't do this.
"This relationship," I say. His eyes narrow. "Not now at least. I need time to gather myself first. I'm sorry." He kisses my forehead and steps back.
"Okay then."

AN: My eyes are watery from writing this, so joke. Comment what you think will happen with them!! And thank you, this story as reached 800+ reads! Share! Stay alive |-/ -Veah