Phil : Mummy :(
Mom : Yeah, honey :)
Phil : We broke up.
Mom : Who broke up?
Phil : Me and Dan.
Mom : Hahaha baby that's very funny. Now tell me what you want?
Phil : Mom, we really broke up :'(
Mom : Phil, I don't have time for jokes.
Phil : Mummy!
Mom : Yeah!
Phil : Me and Dan broke up.
Mom : You said that already.
Phil : Aren't you sad?
Mom : No, not really.
Phil : Why?
Mom : Because they can hear you having sex all the way from China.
Phil : ......
Mom : I'm serious, Phil. I'm very happy that your relationship is going well and Dan is like my own son but you fuck like bunnies.
Phil : .....
Phil : Mum I never thought you would use such vulgar language.
Mom : Well, I had to. I didn't say anything because I didn't want to embarrass you kids but can you please keep it down a little bit next time you come to visit?
Phil : .....
Phil : Sorry, we can't.
Mom : Stop joking, Phil! I'm serious! The old couple that live across the street from us call you two porn stars!
Phil : ⊙▃⊙
Phil : Oh my god.
Mom : Yeah, do you get it now?
Phil : .....
Phil : .....
Phil : Do you think we'll look good as porn stars?
Mom : (ಠ_ಠ)
YOU ARE READING
Candy Love//Phan
FanfictionPhil: MUM I THINK I'M IN LOVE WITH DAN Mom: He's your future husband sweet heart of course you love him. Dan Howell and Phil Lester have been dating for 8 years now, but they're still so smitten with each other that even the phandom finds it adorabl...
