Better Together (Patrick Kane)

20| There's Good In Every Day

Danielle

"You got it" I ask as I help Stan out of the car. He stumbles a little but he finds his footing.

"Yeah, I got it. Just don't let go" he begs as I hold him up. We slowly make it from the garage to the front door of the house. Once I let us in I rest him in his recliner he claimed in the living room and I go back to close the door.

"Daddy's home" Cam cheers running into the living room. He tries to climb into his lap and Stan lets out a soft groan.

"Hey buddy, daddy can't play right now. How about you go get a movie and we can all watch it" I suggest and he lights up.

"Okay" he yells taking off down the hall. I go in the kitchen and get him a water and return to the living room. Stan just sat in the dark staring out of the window, not even blinking. I feel my heart break a little as he just sits there motionless. This is hell.

"Do you know how hard it is to tell your child that you can't hold them" he asks.

"No, but I know how hard it is to want a parent to hold you and them not even be there" I remember and he turns to me.

"I'm so sorry... I didn't mean it like that" he says and I shake my head.

"It's fine, really" I say softly. I squat next to him and grab his hand. He looks at me and it looked like he wanted to cry. He had started treatment and this is his first time being home since the stem cell transplant. Basically they were altering his blood so they can administer more chemo to him without it being deadly and it's draining. It takes well over a hour to get to blood transferred into his body and the side effects are harsh. He was trying his hardest to assure everyone he was okay, but I knew better.

"Listen, when my mom-" I start.

"This isn't anything like your mom" he assures me.

"I know, let me finish. My mom, she felt the same way you did. She was too weak to braid my hair when I wanted it done or couldn't come see me play soccer. She hated that she couldn't be around when she wanted to be. But it's okay, I promise that your kids understand. I watched my mom do things she shouldn't have for me. She told me every day that if she was to die it would be okay because she had me and that's why she wanted to keep living. She reminded me every day that cancer is strong but family is stronger. Every day won't be good, but there's good in every day" I smile. He smiles back and it made me feel better.

"I'm so lucky you came to live with me" he claims.

"I love you a lot Uncle Stan, you're whole family. And I would be nowhere with you guys. I just want you to know that I'm with you through it all. We're going to get you better and I'm not going to take your job while you're gone" I tease.

"Thank god, because you probably could" he laughs.

Cam comes back with Blades of Glory in his hands and Stans eyes go big.

"What is that" he asks.

"Hockey movie" Cam claims and I try to stifle my laughter.

"That's not hockey buddy" Stan explains.

"They're on ice. Hockey is on ice" Cam pouts.

"That's not about hockey. Where I'm the world did you get that" he asks.

"Patrick's room" he says and Stans shakes his head. I couldn't stifle my laughter there. Stan glares at me and I cover my mouth.

"Please put it back and pick something from your room" he begs.

"Fine" the little boy huffs.

Patrick was at the last away game of the year and Suzanne was out getting Stans medication. My grandpa was moving out in July when it became official he would be working here so it was just me and Stan and the kids right now.